You Re Lost In The Generation Gap Between Baby Boomers And Generation X If

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You're Lost in the Generation Gap Between
Baby Boomers and Generation X If...

You remember when Jordache jeans with a flat-handle comb in the back
pocket was cool.

You know any "Weird Al" Yankovic songs by heart.

You've ever rung someone's doorbell and said "Landshark!"

You were once bowled over by the technological excellence of such products
as Atari, IntelliVision, telStar and Coleco.

You remember the premier of MTV-or worse yet, you remember its
predecessor, "Friday Night Videos."

A predominant color in your childhood photos is plaid.

You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the minivan.
(Related to No. 10) You rode in the back of the station wagon facing the
cars behind you.

You've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following
phrases: "You know, back then...," "When I was your age...," or "When I
was younger..."

You ever dressed to look like someone in a Madonna, Cyndi Lauper or Duran
Duran video.

You remember with pain the day the Green Machine hit the streets (or the
sidewalks), instantly making your Big Wheel obsolete.

The age-old question "Where's the beef?" still makes you laugh.

You had a crush on Ted the photographer on "Love Boat," Gage from
"Emergency," or Ponch from "CHIPS."

Your hair at some point in time in the '80s could only be described by
saying "I was experimenting."

You've ever shopped at Benetton.

You remember trying to guess which episode of "The Brady Bunch" it was by
the first scene.

You had a front-row seat (i.e., blew off one or more classes)for Luke and
Laura's wedding on "GH."

You know who shot J.R.

You recall when Love's Baby Soft was in every girl's Christmas stocking.

This rings a bell: "My name is Charlie, and they work for me."

You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on. (Related item: you were
sure that "New Coke" would NEVER catch on.)

You know all the words to the double-album set of the "Grease" soundtrack.

You've ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut.

You sat with your friends on any given Friday night circa 1982 and dialed
867-5309 to see if Jenny as actually there.

"All skate, change directions" means something to you.

You've ever owned a pair of rainbow suspenders like the ones Mork used to
wear.

You bought a pair of Vans and wanted to order a pizza in history class so
you could be just like Jeff Spicoli.(Related item: if you've ever smacked
yourself in the head with a shoe and exclaimed, "I'm SO wasted!"

You were too young to see "Blue Lagoon," so you just had to settle for the
second-hand reports.

You remember when movies were only PG and R.

You remember when your cable TV box had a sliding selector switch...and
your "cable remote" was connected to the TV by a CORD!

You remember Bo and Luke Duke, Daisy, Boss Hogg, or - worst of all - what
Sheriff Roscoe's full name was.

Your parents paid $2,000 for a top-loading VCR that was almost the size of
a coffee table.

You found nothing strange about Bert and Ernie living together.

You remember having a rotary phone.

You actually believed that Mikey, famed kid on the Life cereal
commercials, died after eating Pop Rocks and drinking a Coke.

"Members Only" jackets...say no more.

And lastly, I'll make a song stick in your head for the rest of the day:
you actually remember the words to the theme song of "The Greatest
American Hero." ("BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I'M WALKIN' ON AIR...I NEVER THOUGHT
I COULD FEEL SO FREE-EE-EE...")


Next section from "Trippy Hippie" (another 30-something):

That tank-sized top-loading VCR was a Beta

And the station wagon was a Ford Pinto

One word: Dittos!

Three words: "Saturday Night Fever".

You owned a satin jacket with "Roller Disco" on the back (and/or
jogging-shoe roller skates)

You wore Dolfin shorts to school

Your parents bought your school clothes from FedMart or Gemco, and saved
S&H Green Stamps

Your preschool TV favorites: "Romper Room", "Beany & Cecil" and "Electric
Company".

Your elementary school favorites: "Battlestar Galactica", "Benny Hill",
"Little House", "H.R. Puffnstuff" and "Adam-12".

You snuck out of bed on Saturday nights hoping to see the "Mr. Bill Show".

You have personally experienced the following phrase: Rocky Horror Picture
Show Audience Participation. **Bonus points if more than 10 times.

You owned a "dartboard" poster that said "Put A Hole-a In the Ayatollah"

You wore feathered roach clips as hair ornaments

You wore any of the following (when they were in style, that is): "Hang
Ten", Clip-on koalas, "rainbow" shirts; "prairie" skirts; "breaker wedge"
shoes; "gauchos" (ack!); Mexican pullover jackets; Gloria Vanderbilt
cords, "Death Before Disco" t-shirts, or the "Flashdance" look

You had a crush on Buck Rogers, Jeff Spicoli, Andy Gibb, Donny Osmond,\
Leif Garrett, Peter Frampton or Shawn Cassidy

You had a metal KISS lunchbox in grade school

You hear "Batman" and think of Adam West in pantyhose

Your childhood memories include a burnt orange/avocado green kitchen

You know what "Let's Get Small" and "King Tut" have in common.

You've done both "The Hustle" and the "Safety Dance".

Two words: Pac Man.

Two more: My Sharona.

You find yourself saying: "A long time ago we had these things called
record players..." ((I ACTUALLY said this to my kid recently)

You remember saying "in 2000, I'll be 30-something years old." and it
seemed soooo far away.

You've recently begun to consider "Can I see your I.D" a compliment

You remember how kids who wore "floods" to school were mercilessly
teased...and can't believe it's actually a style now

And lastly...you thought the Greatest American Hero was an awesome babe!

HERE'S ANOTHER GROUP - FROM "CAT WOMAN"
YOUR 1ST CAR WAS YOUR DAD'S OLD PACER, PINTO, HORNET OR GREMLIN. EXTRA
POINTS IF IT WAS FLAT GOLD OR ORANGE.

MORE TV FARE: "PLANET OF THE APES" AND "LAUGH IN"

THE CLOTHES YOU HATED BUT YOUR MOM MADE YOU WEAR IN GRADE SCHOOL ARE RIGHT
NOW TOTALLY IN STYLE WITH TEENAGERS.

YOU LOOK LIKE A FOOL IN JUNIOR CLOTHES, BUT AN OLD LADY IN MISSES'.

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  487. [page] The Stock Market
  488. [page] The Taco Bell Chihuahua
  489. [page] The Top 14 Special Powers Of The Young Darth Vader
  490. [page] The Ugly Duckling
  491. [page] The World S Thinnest Books
  492. [page] Things Guys Think Girls Should Know
  493. [page] Things I Must Remember - By A Puppy
  494. [page] Things You Don T Want To Hear Over An Airline PA System
  495. [page] Things You Would Never Know Without The Movies
  496. [page] Things That Bother Me
  497. [page] Things To Do At A Boring Movie
  498. [page] Things To Do At The Mall
  499. [page] Things To Say At Thanksgiving
  500. [page] This Year S Freshmen
  501. [page] Three Jokes
  502. [page] Three Strong Mice
  503. [page] Tickle-Me Elmo Factory
  504. [page] Time For God
  505. [page] Tips For A Lifetime
  506. [page] Tipsey Fruit Cake Recipe (Alternate)
  507. [page] Tipsy Fruit Cake Recipe
  508. [page] Titanic (the Short Sarcastic Version)
  509. [page] Titanic S Last Mystery Revealed
  510. [page] To My Dear Girlfriend
  511. [page] To Women Everywhere From A Man Who S Had Enough
  512. [page] Tom Swifties
  513. [page] Top 10 Reasons Eve Was Created
  514. [page] Top 10 Slogans Rejected By Motel 6
  515. [page] Top 10 Summer Camps You Should Not Send Your Kids To
  516. [page] Top 10 Signs That You Know It S Time To Join E-mailers Anonymous
  517. [page] Top 11 Reasons To Go To Work Naked
  518. [page] Top 12 Pick Up Lines And Comebacks
  519. [page] Top 21 Things Not To Say When Pulled Over
  520. [page] Top 25 Signs That You Have Already Grown Up
  521. [page] Top 33 Sexually Suggestive Lines In Star Wars
  522. [page] Top 36 Seminars For Males
  523. [page] Top 50 Things To Say When You Catch Your Roomate Having Sex
  524. [page] Top Seven Fears Of The Fabric Softener Bear
  525. [page] Top Ten Elf Pick-Up Lines
  526. [page] Top Ten Reasons Trick Or Treating Is Better Than Sex
  527. [page] Top Ten Reasons It Sucks To Be A Dick
  528. [page] Top Ten Rejected Slogans For Firestone Tires
  529. [page] Top Ten Rejection Lines Given By Men And Women
  530. [page] Top Ten Sex Jokes
  531. [page] Top Ten Signs You Re At A Redneck Wedding
  532. [page] Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women
  533. [page] Top Ten Things Only Women Understand
  534. [page] Top Ten Ways Y2K Will Affect Disney World
  535. [page] Trojan Horse Warning
  536. [page] Trouble In Heaven
  537. [page] True Ending To The Empire Strikes Back
  538. [page] Truisms
  539. [page] Truth About Reindeer
  540. [page] Twas The Month After X-Mas (Dieters Version)
  541. [page] Twas The Night Before X-Mas (Computer Version)
  542. [page] Twas The Week After X-Mas (Y2K Poem)
  543. [page] Twelve Gay Days Of X-Mas
  544. [page] Two Assholes
  545. [page] Two Blonde Jokes
  546. [page] Two Indians And A Polack
  547. [page] Two Italian Men
  548. [page] Two Things To Worry About
  549. [page] Universal Grade Change Form
  550. [page] Urban Legends All In One Letter
  551. [page] Vacuum Salesman
  552. [page] Van Gough S Relatives
  553. [page] Versailles
  554. [page] Veterinarian
  555. [page] Vibrator
  556. [page] Vincentian Vs American
  557. [page] Vulgarity Test
  558. [page] WORK Virus
  559. [page] Ways To Tell You Re Too Drunk
  560. [page] Wedgewood Shooting
  561. [page] Weird Job Interviews
  562. [page] Weird Local Sex Laws
  563. [page] What Day Is Your Birthday?
  564. [page] What Do You Call Your Dick?
  565. [page] What Does Your Name Mean? (Mean Version)
  566. [page] What Guys Names Mean
  567. [page] What Guys And Girls Are Really Saying
  568. [page] What Men Really Mean
  569. [page] What Are Dogs And Cats Really?
  570. [page] What Do You Want In A Woman?
  571. [page] What S Your Screen Name Mean?
  572. [page] When Santa Runs Out Of Prozac
  573. [page] Where Is God?
  574. [page] Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel
  575. [page] Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
  576. [page] Why Dogs Are Better Pets Than Cats
  577. [page] Why Girls Like Guys And Vice Versa
  578. [page] Why God Never Got Tenure
  579. [page] Why I Fired My Secretary
  580. [page] Why Jesus Is Better Than Santa Claus
  581. [page] Why Nagging A Man Doesn T Work
  582. [page] Why We Should Feel Sorry For Tech Support
  583. [page] Wilbur And Martha
  584. [page] Windows 98 Southern Edition
  585. [page] Windows Errors In Haiku
  586. [page] Winter Wonderland Computer Parodies
  587. [page] Wisdom From The Bathroom Walls
  588. [page] Woman S Guide To Male Bashing
  589. [page] Women Rule
  590. [page] Women Are Bright Because
  591. [page] WordPerfect Helpline
  592. [page] Work Phrases
  593. [page] World S Shortest Books
  594. [page] Worms And Alcohol
  595. [page] Worst Analogies
  596. [page] Worst Country Songs
  597. [page] Y0K And Y1K Problems
  598. [page] Yo Mama So Stupid (and Ugly)
  599. [page] You Know You Re Getting Old When
  600. [page] You Know You Re An Idiot When
  601. [page] You Might Be A Yankee If
  602. [page] You Might Be From Lousiville If
  603. [page] You Might Have A Redneck Yard If
  604. [page] You Might Be A Redneck If
  605. [page] You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If
  606. [page] You Re Lost In The Generation Gap Between Baby Boomers And Generation X If
  607. [page] Yummy Fingers