"I LOVE YOU" in:
Afrikaans : Ek is lief vir jou
: Ek het jou lief
Albanian : Te dua
: Te dashuroj
: Ti je zemra ime
Alentejano : Gosto de ti, porra!
Alsacien (Elsass) : Ich hoan dich gear
Amharic (Aethio.) : Afekrishalehou
: Afekrischalehou
American Sign Language : __ (signed with right hand)
: __ ( )
: ( ) |__|
: |__| __ __ | |
: | |( )( )|__| __
: |__||__||__|| | / )
: | (__)(__) | / /
: | |/ /
: | / /
: \ /
Apache : Sheth she~n zho~n (nasalized vowels like
French, '~n' as in French
'salon')
Arabic (formal) : Ohiboke (male to female)
: Ohiboki (male to female)
: Ohibokoma (male or female to two males
or two females)
: Nohiboke (more than one male or females
to female)
: Nohiboka (male to male or female to male)
: Nohibokoma (male to male or female to two
males or two females)
: Nohibokom (male to male or female to more
than two males)
: Nohibokon (male to male or female to more
than two females)
Arabic (proper) : Ooheboki (male to female)
: Ooheboka (female to male)
Arabic : Ana behibak (female to male)
: Ana behibek (male to female)
: Ahebich (male to female)
: Ahebik (female to male)
: Ana ahebik
: Ib'n hebbak
: Ana ba-heb-bak
: Bahibak (female to male)
: Bahibik (male to female)
: Benhibak (more than one male or female to male)
: Benhibik (male to male or female to female)
: Benhibkom (male to male or female to more
than one male)
: Nhebuk (spoken to someone of importance)
Arabic (Umggs.) : Ana hebbek
Armenian : Yes kez si'rumem
Assamese : Moi tomak bhal pau
Bangladeschi : Ami tomake walobashi
Basque : Nere maitea
Bassa : Mengweswe
Batak : Holong rohangku di ho
Bemba : Ndikufuna
Bengali : Aami tomaake bhaalo baashi
: Ami tomay bhalobashi
: Ami tomake bahlobashi
Berber : Lakh tirikh
Bicol : Namumutan ta ka
Bolivian Quechua : Qanta munani
Bosnian : Volim te
Braille : :..:| ..:| |..-.. .::":.., :.:;
Brazilian/Portuguese : Eu te amo (pronounced 'eiu chee amu')
: Amo te
Bulgarian : Obicham te
: As te obeicham
: As te obicham
: Obozhavam te ("I love you very much")
Burmese : Chit pa de
Cambodian : Kh_nhaum soro_lahn nhee_ah
: Bon sro lanh oon
Canadian French : Sh'teme (spoken, sounds like this)
: Je t'aime ("I like you")
: Je t'adore ("I love you")
Catalan : T'estimo (Catalonian)
: T'estim (Mallorcan)
: T'estime (Valencian)
: T'estim molt ("I love you a lot")
Cebuano : Gihigugma ko ikaw
Chamoru (or Chamorro) : Hu guaiya hao
Cheyenne : Ne mohotatse
Chichewa : Ndimakukonda
Chickasaw : Chiholloli (first 'i' nasalized)
Chinese : Goa ai li (Amoy)
: Ngo oi ney (Cantonese)
: Wo oi ney ( " )
: Ngai oi gnee (Hakka)
: Ngai on ni ( " )
: Wa ai lu (Hokkien)
: Wo ai ni (Mandarin)
: Wo ie ni ( " )
: Wuo ai nee ( " )
: Wo ay ni ( " )
: Wo ai ni (Putunghua)
: Ngo ai nong (Wu)
Corsican : Ti tengu cara (male to female)
: Ti tengu caru (female to male)
Creol : Mi aime jou
Croatian (familiar) : Ja te volim (used in proper speech)
: Volim te (used in common speech)
Croatian (formal) : Ja vas volim (used in proper speech)
: Volim vas (used in common speech)
: Ljubim te (in todays useage, "I kiss you",
'lj' pronounced like 'll' in
Spanish, one sound, 'ly'ish)
Croatian (old) : Ljubim te (may still be found in poetry)
Czech : Miluji te (a downwards pointing arrowhead
on top of the 'e' in te)
: Miluju te! (colloquial form)
: Ma'm te (velmi) ra'd (male speaker, "I like
you (very much)", often
used and prefered)
: Ma'm te (velmi) ra'da (female speaker)
Danish : Jeg elsker dig
Dusun : Siuhang oku dia
Dutch : Ik hou van je
: Ik hou van jou
: Ik bemin je (old fashioned)
: Ik bemin jou ( " )
: Ik heb je lief ( " )
: Ik ben verliefd op je ("I am in love with you")
: Ik ben verliefd op jou ( " )
: Ik houd erg veel van jou ("I love you very
: Ik houd erg veel van je much")
: Ik vind je leuk ("I like you")
: Ik vind je aardig ( " )
: Ik vind je heel erg leuk ("I like you very
: Ik vind je heel aardig much")
: Ik mag jou wel ("I like you")
: Ik mag jou heel graag ("I like you very much")
(the last two are more superficial, thus more
suitable for male to male)
Ecuador Quechua : Canda munani
English : I love you
: I adore you
: I love thee (used only in Christian context)
Esperanto : Mi amas vin
Estonian : Mina armastan sind
: Ma armastan sind
Ethiopian : Afgreki'
Farsi (old) : Tora dust mi daram
Farsi : Tora dost daram ("I love you")
: Asheghetam
: Doostat daram ("I'm in love with you")
: Man asheghetam ("I'm in love with you")
Filipino : Mahal kita
: Iniibig kita
Finnish (formal) : Mina" rakastan sinua
: Rakastan sinua
: Mina" pida"n sinusta ("I like you")
Finnish : (Ma") rakastan sua
: (Ma") tykka"a"n susta ("I like you")
French : Je t'aime ("I love you")
: Je t'adore ("I love you", stronger meaning
between lovers)
: J' t'aime bien ("I like you", meant for friends
and family, not for lovers)
French (formal) : Je vous aime
Gaelic : Ta gra agam ort
: Moo graugh hoo
Ghanaian : Me dor wo
German (formal) : Ich liebe Sie (rarely used)
German : Ich liebe dich
: Ich hab dich lieb (not so classic and
conservative)
German dialects:
Bavarian (Bayrisch) : I moag di gern
(Bavaria/Bayern) : I mog di (right answer: "I di a")
: I lieb di
Berlin dialect : Ick liebe dir (Old, very old)
(Berlinerisch) : Ick liebe Dich
Berner-Deutsch : Ig liebe di
Bochumer : Ich lieb Dich!
Franconian (Fra"nkisch): Du gfa"llsd mer fai
(Franconia/Franken) : Bisd scho mai gouds freggerla (already in a
relationship)
: Mid dier ma"cherd ich a amol (sexually touched,
ment as a compliment, not litterally)
(the above 3 entries really mean "I like you",
a Franke would never say "I love you")
Friesian (Friesisch) : Ik hou fan dei (sp?)
: Ik hald fan dei
Hessian (Hessisch) : Isch habb disch libb
Saarla"ndisch : Isch hann disch lieb
Saxon (Sa"chsisch) : Isch liebdsch
Swabian (Schwa"bisch) : ( ? )
Swiss German : Ch'ha di ga"rn
(Schweizerdeutsch)
Vorarlberg dialect : I stand total uf di
(Vorarlbergerisch)
Greek : S'ayapo (spoken "s'agapo", 3rd letter is lower
case 'gamma')
: Eime eroteumenos mazi sou ("I'm in love with)
: Eime eroteumenos me 'sena(you", male to female)
: Eime eroteumeni mazi sou ("I'm in love with)
: Eime eroteumeni me 'sena (you", female to male)
: Se latrevo ("I adore you")
: Se thelo ("I want you", denotes sexual desire)
Greek (Arhea/Ancient) : Philo se
Greenlandic : Asavakit
Gronings : Ik hol van die
Guarani' : Rohiyu (ro-hai'-hyu)
Gujrati : Hoon tane pyar karoochhoon.
: Hoon tuney chaoon chhoon ('n' is nasal, not
pronounced)
Hausa : Ina sonki
Hawaiian : Aloha wau ia oi
: Aloha wau ia oi nui loa ("I love you
very much")
Hebrew : Anee ohev otakh (male to female)
: Anee ohevet otkha (female to male)
: Anee ohev otkha (male to male)
: Anee ohevet otakh (female to female)
('kh' pronounced like
Spanish 'j', Dutch 'g', or similiar to
French 'r')
Hindi : Mai tumase pyar karata hun (male to female)
: Mai tumase pyar karati hun (female to male)
: Mai tumse pyar karta hoon
: Mai tumse peyar karta hnu
: Mai tumse pyar karta hoo
: Mai tujhe pyaar kartha hoo
: Mae tumko peyar kia
: Main tumse pyar karta hoon
: Main tumse prem karta hoon
: Main tuze pyar karta hoon ('n' is nasal, not
pronounced)
Hopi : Nu' umi unangwa'ta
Hungarian : Szeretlek
: Te'gedet szeretlek ("It's you I love and
no one else")
: Szeretlek te'ged ("It's you I love, you know,
you", a reinforcement)
(The above two entries are never heard in
a normal context.)
Icelandic : Eg elska thig (pronounced 'yeg l-ska thig')
Ilocano : Ay ayating ka
Indonesian : Saya cinta padamu ('Saya', commonly used)
: Saya cinta kamu ( " )
: Saya kasih saudari ( " )
: Saja kasih saudari ( " )
: Aku tjinta padamu ('Aku', not often used)
: Aku cinta padamu ( " )
: Aku cinta kamu ( " )
Italian : Ti amo (relationship/lover/spouse)
: Ti voglio bene (between friends)
: Ti voglio (strong sexual meaning, "I want
you", refering to other person's
body)
Irish : Taim i' ngra leat
Irish/Gaelic : t'a gr'a agam dhuit
Japanese : Kimi o ai shiteru
: Aishiteru
: Chuu shiteyo
: Ora omee no koto ga suki da
: Ore wa omae ga suki da
: Suitonnen
: Sukiyanen
: Sukiyo
: Watashi wa anata ga suki desu
: Watashi wa anata wo aishithe imasu
: Watashi wa anata o aishitemasu
: A-i-shi-te ma-su
: Watakushi-wa anata-wo ai shimasu
: Suki desu (used at the first time, like for a
start, when you are not yet real lovers)
Javanese : Kulo tresno
Kannada : Naanu ninnanu preethisuthene
: Naanu ninnanu mohisuthene
Kikongo : Mono ke zola nge (mono ke' zola nge')
Kiswahili : Nakupenda
: Nakupenda wewe
: Nakupenda malaika ("I love you, (my) angel")
Klingon : bangwI' SoH ("You are my beloved")
: qamuSHa' ("I love you")
: qamuSHa'qu' ("I love you very much")
: qaparHa' ("I like you")
: qaparHa'qu' ("I like you very much!")
(words are often unnecessary as the thought
is most often conveyed nonverbally with
special growlings)
Korean : Dangsinul saranghee yo
: Saranghee
: Nanun dangsineul joahapnida ("I like you")
: Nanun dangsineul mucheog joahapnida ("I like
very much")
: Nanun dangsineul saranghapnida
: Nanun dangsineul mucheog saranghapnida ("I love
you very much")
: Nanun gdaega joa
: Nanun gdaereul saranghapnida
: Nanun neoreul saranghanda
: Joahaeyo
: Saranghaeyo (more formal)
: Saranghapanida (more respectful)
: Norul sarang hae
: Tangshini choayo
Kpele : I walikana
Kurdish : Ez te hezdikhem
Lao : Khoi hak jao
: Khoi mak jao lai ("I love you very much")
: Khoi hak jao lai ("I like you very much")
: Khoi mak jao (This means "I prefer you",
but is used for "I love you".)
Latin : Te amo
: Vos amo
Latin (old) : (Ego) Amo te ('Ego', for emphasis)
Latvian : Es tevi milu (pronounced 'es tevy meelu')
('i in 'milu' has a line over it,
a 'long i')
: Es milu tevi (less common)
Lebanese : Bahibak
Lingala : Nalingi yo
Lisbon lingo : Gramo-te bue', chavalinha!
Lithuanian : Tave myliu (Ta-ve mee-lyu)
: Ash mir lutavah
Lojban : Mi do prami
Luo : Aheri
Luxembourgish : Ech hun dech ga"r
Maa : Ilolenge
Macedonian : Te sakam (a little stronger than "I like you")
: Te ljubam ("I really love you")
: Jas te sakam ('j' sounds like 'y' in May)
: Pozdrav ("Greetings")
Madrid lingo : Me molas, Tronca!
Maiese : Wa wa
Malay/Indonesian : Saya cintakan kamu (grammatically correct)
: Saya cinta akan kamu(expanded version of above)
: Saya sayangkan kamu (grammatically correct)
: Saya sayang akan kamu (expanded version)
: Aku cinta pada mu (most direct translation)
: Saya cintakan awak
: Aku cinta pada kau
: Saya cinta pada mu (best, most commonly used)
: Saya sayangkan engkau ('engkau' often shortened
to 'kau', 'engkau' is informal form and should
only be used if you know the person _really_
well)
: Saya sayang pada mu
: Aku sayangkan engkau
: Saya sayang pada mu
: Aku menyintai mu
: Aku menyayangi mu
: Aku kasih pada mu
: Aku jatuh cinta padabot
Malayalam : Ngan ninne snaehikkunnu
: Njyaan ninne' preetikyunnu
: Njyaan ninne' mohikyunnu
Marathi : Mi tuzya var prem karato
: Me tujhashi prem karto (male to female)
: Me tujhashi prem karte (female to male)
Mohawk : Konoronhkwa
Moroccan : Kanbhik (both mean the same, but spoken)
: Kanhebek (in different cities)
Navaho : Ayor anosh'ni
Ndebele : Niyakutanda
Norwegian : Jeg elsker deg (Bokmaal)
: Eg elskar deg (Nynorsk)
: Jeg elsker deg (Riksmaal: outdated, formerly
used by upper-class and
conservative people)
Nyanja : Ninatemba
Op : Op lopveop yopuop
Osetian : Aez dae warzyn
Pakistani : Mujhe tumse muhabbat hai
: Muje se mu habbat hai
Papiamento : Mi ta stima'bo
Pig Latin : Ie ovele ouye
Phillipino : Mahal kita
: Iniibig kita
Polish : Kocham cie
: Kocham ciebie
: Ja cie kocham
: Yacha kocham
Portuguese/Brazilian : Eu te amo (pronounced 'eiu chee amu')
: Amo te
Pulaar : Mbe de yid ma (mbe: d: yidh ma)
(Pronounced as two words,
"Meb deyidma". 'b' and second
'd' have bars through the stems
indicating affrication, the ':'
indicate minute pauses)
Punjabi : Main tainu pyar karna
: Mai taunu pyar karda
Quenya : Tye-mela'ne
Raetoromanisch : Te amo
Romanian : Te iubesc
: Te ador (stronger)
Russian : Ya vas lyublyu (old fashioned)
: Ya tyebya lyublyu (best)
: Ya lyublyu vas (old fashioned)
: Ya lyublyu tyebya
Samoan : Ou te alofa outou
: Talo'fa ia te oe
Sanskrit : Anurag (a higher love, like the love of music
or art)
Scot-Gaelic : Tha gradh agam ort
Serbian (formal) : Ja vas volim (used in proper speech)
: Volim vas (used in common speech)
: Ljubim te (in todays useage, "I kiss you",
'lj' pronounced like 'll' in
Spanish, one sound, 'ly'ish)
Serbian (familiar) : Ja te volim (used in proper speech)
: Volim te (used in common speech)
Serbian (old) : Ljubim te (may still be found in poetry)
Serbocroatian : Volim te
: Ljubim te
: Ja te volim ('j' sounds like 'y' in May)
Shona : Ndinokuda
Singhalese : Mama oyaata aadareyi
: Mama oyata adarei
Sioux : Techihhila
Slovak : Lubim ta
Slovene : Ljubim te
Spanish : Te amo
: Te quiero
: Te adoro ("I adore you")
: Te deseo ("I desire you")
: Me antojis ("I crave you")
Srilankan : Mama oyata arderyi
Swahili : Nakupenda
: Naku penda (followed by the person's name)
: Ninikupenda
: Dholu'o
Swedish : Jag a"lskar dig
Syrian/Lebanese : Bhebbek (male to female)
: Bhebbak (female to male)
Tagalog : Mahal kita
Tahitian : Ua here au ia oe
: Ua here vau ia oe
Tamil : Naan unnai kadalikiren
: Nan unnai kathalikaren
: Ni yaanai kaadli karen ("You love me")
: N^an unnaki kathalikkinren ("I love you")
: Nam vi'rmberem
Telugu : Ninnu premistunnanu
: Neenu ninnu pra'mistu'nnanu
: Nenu ninnu premistunnanu
Thai (formal) : Phom rak khun (male to female)
: Ch'an rak khun (female to male)
Thai : Khao raak thoe (affectionate, sweet, loving)
Tswana : Dumela
Tunisian : Ha eh bak
Turkish (formal) : Sizi seviyorum
Turkish : Seni seviyorum
: Seni begeniyorum ("I adore you")
(g has a bar on it)
Twi : Me dowapaa
Ukrainian : Ya tebe kokhayu
: Ja tebe kokhaju (real true love)
: Ja vas kokhaju
: Ja pokokhav tebe
: Ja pokokhav vas
Urdu : Main tumse muhabbat karta hoon
: Mujhe tumse mohabbat hai
: Mujge tumae mahabbat hai
: Kam prem kartahai
Vai : Na lia
Vietnamese : Anh ye^u em (male to female)
: Em ye^u anh (female to male)
: Toi yeu em
Vulcan : Wani ra yana ro aisha
Welsh : Rwy'n dy garu di
: Yr wyf i yn dy garu di (chwi)
Wolof : Da ma la nope
: Da ma la nop (da ma'lanop)
Yiddish : Ikh hob dikh lib
: Ich libe dich
: Ich han dich lib
Yucatec Maya : 'in k'aatech (the love of lovers)
: 'in yabitmech (the love of family, which
lovers can also feel; it
indicates more a desire to
spoil and protect the other
person)
Yugoslavian : Ja te volim
Zazi : Ezhele hezdege (sp?)
Zulu : Mena tanda wena
: Ngiyakuthanda!
Zuni : Tom ho' ichema
Explanation of Languages
------------------------
Afrikaans -> spoken by people of Dutch heritage in South Africa
Alentejano -> language spoken in Portugal
Alsacien -> French/German dialect (live in France, but speak
like Germans)
Apache -> North American Indian Nation rangeing from the plains
states to the eastern Rocky Mountains and from the
Canadian to Mexican borders
Arabic -> language spoken in the Arab countries including
but not limited to Bahrain, Egypt, Iraq, Jordan,
Kuwait, Libya, Morocco, Saudi Arabia, Sudan, and
the region of Palestine.
Assamese -> language spoken in the state of Assam, India
Bassa -> language spoken in Africa
Batak -> language spoken in the northern Sumatra province of
Indonesia
Bavarian -> language spoken in the state of Bavaria, southern
Germany (actually a German dialect)
Bemba -> language spoken in Africa
Bengali -> language spoken in the state of West Bengal, India,
as well as almost all people of Bangladesh
Bicol -> Philipino dialect
Braille -> The alphabet represented by patterns of raised dots.
It is 'read' by touch.
Cebuano -> language spoken in Philipines near the town of Cebu
Cheyenne -> North American Indian tribe, part of the Apache
Nation
Chichewa -> language spoken in Malawi, Central Africa
Chickasaw -> North American Indian tribe (southeastern Oklahoma)
Creol -> French dialect spoken by people who migrated from
Canada to the Louisiana, USA, area
Dusun -> language spoken by the Dusun tribe, one of the largest
in North Borneo
Dutch -> language spoken in the Netherlands and the provinces
of East- and West-Flanders, Antwerp, Limburg, and
Flemmish-Brabant, Belgium
Esperanto -> The International Language
Farsi -> language spoken in Iran. Dialects of Farsi spoken in
Pakistan and Afghanestan. Farsi is sometimes called
Persian.
Franconian -> German dialect spoken by the citizens of Franken or
Franconia which is part of Bavaria in the area
around Nuremberg
French -> language spoken in France, Canada, and the provinces
of Luxembourg, Namur, Liege, Hainault, and Brabant-
Walloon(Brabant of the Walloons), Belgium
Friesian -> language spoken in northern Holland, northern
Germany, and in some parts of Denmark
(mainly west coast)
Gaelic -> language spoken in Ireland
Gronings -> Dutch dialect
Guarani' -> one of the two official languages in Paraguay
Gujrati -> language spoken in the state of Gujrat, India, and
Pakistan
Hakka -> Chinese dialect from Manchuria
Hausa -> language spoken in Nigeria
Hindi -> language spoken in the northern states of India
Hopi -> North American Indian tribe (southwest, Arizona)
Ilocano -> Filopino dialect
Kannada -> language spoken in the state of Karnataka,
southern India
Kikongo -> language spoken in Zaire, Africa
Klingon -> Spoken in Star Trek. Proper term for the language
is "tlhIngan Hol". The Klingon homeworld is
Qo'noS, in English it's Kronos.
Kpele -> language spoken in Africa
Lao -> language spoken in Laos and by the Laotian people
living in northern Thailand
Luo -> language spoken in Kenya
Luxembourgish -> language spoken in Luxembourg and in the border areas
in Belgium (Arlon), France (Thionville), and Germany.
A mixture of French and German, with the emphasis on
German.
Maa -> language spoken in Africa
Malayalam -> language spoken in the state of Kerala, India
Marathi -> language spoken in the state of Maharastra, India
(Bombay is the capital city)
Mohawk -> North American Indian tribe (New England, maybe one of
the Seven Nations/Iriquois?)
Moroccan -> language spoken in Morocco, North Africa
Navaho -> North American Indian tribe (southwest)
Ndebele -> language spoken in Zimbabwe
Nyanja -> language spoken in Africa
Papiamento -> language spoken on the island of Aruba
Pulaar -> dialect spoken in Senegal by the Fulani people
Punjabi -> language spoken in the state of Punjab, northern India
Quechua -> language spoken by Incan Indians (South America)
Quenya -> Elvish language invented by J. R. R. Tolkien for his
books. Notably, "The Lord of the Rings".
Shona -> language spoken in Zimbabwe
Singhalese -> Language of the non-Tamil (majority) people of
Sri Lanka. Also spoken in Ceylon.
Sioux -> North American Indian tribe (upper midwest)
Swahili -> language spoken by some indigenous tribes of East
Africa
Tagalog -> Philipino dialect
Tamil -> language spoken in the state of Tamil Nadu, India,
and in Sri Lanka, Singapore, Malaysia, Mauritus
Telugu -> language spoken in the state of Andhra Pradesh, India
(eleventh most spoken language in the world)
Tswana -> language spoken in Africa
Twi -> language spoken in Africa
Urdu -> language spoken in Pakistan and India
Vai -> language spoken in Africa
Vulcan -> Spoken in Star Trek by Mr. Spock and others from
the planet Vulcan
Walloon -> literally Welsh(not English Welsh), a little used
French dialect with certain German influences
spoken in the provinces of Luxembourg, Namur,
Liege, Hainault, and Brabant-Walloon(Brabant of
the Walloons), Belgium
Wolof -> dialect spoken in Senegal by the Wolof people
Yucatec Maya -> language spoken by indigenous people of the Yucatan
peninsula in Mexico
Zazi -> Kurdic dialect
Zuni -> North American Indian tribe
a' -> 'a' with the acute accent (') over it (ASCII code 160)
a" -> 'a' with two dots (Umlaut) (ASCII code 132)
e^ -> ^ above e
e' -> 'e' with the acute accent (') over it (ASCII code 130)
=======================================================
(no guarantee for correctness though....)
Something extra:
Chinese:
,g Qb ,g ,g Qg Qg
oQQQQ" QQ YQ .odQQQQQQQQQP" QQ' QQ'
QQ QQ " QQ QQ QQ QQ' QQQQQQQQb
QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ dQQQQQQQQQQQQQQb QQQ QQ oo QQ
QQ QQ QQ QQ QQ Q'QQ Q' QQ P'
QQ,o QQ o9, QQQQQQQQQQQQ QQ Q QQ
QQP QQ,QP QQ QQ oQ QQ g
,QQQ QQQ' QQQQQQQQb QQ Q' QQ `Q,
dQ'QQ gQQ QQ gg ,QQ' QQ ,P QQ Qb
Q' QQ oP QQ, dQ' `gQQ' QQ Q QQ `P
QQ `QQ g oQ' ggQQb, QQ f QQ
dQ' `b' oQ oP' "YQao QQ dQ' Dave Chin
Hindu: (Om Shanti, Symbol of Peace and Love and Oneness)
** **
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***** ***** ***** Ashesh Majumdar
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***** ******************** *
***** *********** ***** **
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***** ***** ***** ****
***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***************
************* ***********
******** *****
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100+ Ways To Tell You Re Stuck In The 80 S
100 Ways To Ensure That You Won T Get Laid
101 Fun Things To Do At Wal-Mart
101 Ways To Be Annoying
10 Commandments Of A Teenager
10 Ways The Bible Would Be Different If Written By College Students
10 Ways To Tell Santa Is A Computer Nerd
10 Of Daddy S Rules For Dating
122 Pick Up Lines
12 Ways To Get Rid Of A Telemarketer
12 Ways To Reject Pick-Up Lines
1998 Bumper Stickers
19 Ways To Confuse Santa Claus
25 Signs You Re Getting Older
25 Ways To Drive Your Roommate Crazy
27 Ways To Relieve Stress
30 Fun Things To Do While Driving
30 Harsh Things A Woman Can Say To A Naked Man
39 Creative Ways To Say Someone Is Stupid
40 Mistakes Men Make While Having Sex With Women
40 Things Which Prove You Re A New Yorker
45 Fun Things To Do On An Essay You Don T Care About
50 Fun Things To Do In Class
50 Ways To Confuse People In The Computer Lab
71 Things To Do On An Exam You Know You Re Going To Fail
7 Ways To Be Annoying On Christmas
80 S Nostalgia
A Case For The FBI
A Little X-Mas Story
A Programmer S Guide For Shoot Self In Foot
A Saint
A Soap Misunderstanding
A Thanksgiving Forecast
A Woman S Random Thoughts
A To Z Of Ex-Boyfriends
Actual News
Adam And Eve
Affair With Golf
Al Gore I Am
Alabama Driver S License Application
All Star Parody
All In A Day S Work
Almighty God
An Aussie And A Texan
An Italian Mother
Anagrams
And God Said
Angels, Once In Awhile
Answering Machine Messages
Antigravity, The Feline Butterology Theory
Application To Date My Daughter
Application For White House Intern
Application To Become A Country Singer
Application To Be A Spice Girl
Are You From Ohio?
Are You Having A Bad Day?
Area 51
Arguments For Jesus S Ethnicity
Art Thou Normal?
AsWeSeeIt Site
Ass Emoticons
Assassin Interview
Assorted Thoughts
Bad Day
Bad Luck
Bad Pick-Up Lines
Bad Times Virus Warning
Barbie S Letter To Santa
Barbies For Real Life
Baseball Analogies For Sex
Basic Math Of Men And Women
Bathroom Etiquette
Bathroom Joke
Battle Hymn Of Term Finals
Be Thankful For
Because You Re My Friend
Bedroom Golf Rules
Beer
Beer Quotes
Beer Warnings From FDA
Before I Came To College I Wish I Had Known
Benefits Of Being A Woman
Best T-Shirts Of The Summer
Bird On The Beach
Bird S Legs
Birth Of A Candy Bar
Birthday Tree
Birthmonth And Your Personality
Bitchass Jones
Bits Of Info
Bizarre
Black Men In Elevator
Blind Man
Blonde Joke With Contracter
Blonde Jokes
Blonde Mail Call
Blondes On Top
Blow Jobs: Women Vs Men
Bob Knows Everybody
Born In 1979 Or 1980
Bottom Of The 9th
Box Of Tampons
Brain Cell Humor
Brain Piercing
Breast Stroke Race
Breasts Names
Bright Women
Britney Spears Parody
Bull Story
Bumper Stickers
Bumper Stickers And Quotes
Bungeee
Butterfly Kisses
Canadian Pride
Car Accident
Car Jokes
Carpenter Life Metaphor
Cat Haiku
Celebrity Relocation
Chain Letter For Men Only
Chain Letter For Women Only
Chicken Or The Egg?
Child Support
Children Of The 80 S II
Children Of The 80 S IV
Children S Advice
Children S Books You Will Never See
Children S Books That Didn T Make The Cut
Children S Opinions On Love
Christmas Party Memos
Church Bulletin Typos
Church Jokes
Circle Flies
Clinton Administration Joke
Clinton Joke
Clinton Joke (Not Involving Sex)
Clinton Joke 2
Clinton Jokes
Clinton S Speech Translated
College Acceptance
College Burger Joint Conversations
College Entrance Exam For Basketball Players
College Life
College Majors
College Seniors Vs Freshmen
College Student Confession
Colored Or Not?
Combining Books
Computer Acronyms
Computers: Male Or Female?
Condom Slogans
Condoms
Cool To Do Drugs
Corkscrew
Country Love Acronyms
Country S Strangest Suicide
Cow Corporations
Creative Insults
Cross Nuns
Crying Pregnant Blonde
Cuckoo Clock
Cure For Snoring
CyberSex
Dalai Lama Millennium Message
Darwin Awards 1999
Dead Goldfish
Dead Rabbit Joke
Dear Dr Laura
Death Warning
Deathbed
Detailed Analysis Of The Spice Girls Wannabe
Differences Between High School And College
Dirty Nursery Rhymes
Dispelling Sexual Myths
Dissing Marriage
Diver S Bad Day At Work
Does God Still Speak To Men?
Dog Haiku
Dogs And Computers
Donkey In A Well
Dormitories
Dr Suess Does D C
Driver S Exam Questions
Drunk
Dumb Blonde Jokes
Dumb Lawyers
Dysfunctional X-Mas
E-Mail For A Widow
E-Mail From God
Ebonics Christmas
Eight Jokes
Election Logic Applied To Baseball
Election Logic Applied To Basketball
End-All Virus
Erma Bombeck S If I Had My Life To Live Over
Euphemisms For Your Man
EuroEnglish
Exercise?
FBI Pizza
Farming Pun
Fast And Easy Fruitcake
Feeling Fine
Female Comebacks
Female Drivers
Fictional State Mottos (Alternate)
Final Examination
Finals Story
Firedog Joke
Fireworks Story
Fishing
Five(5) Jokes
Five Hundred Dollars
Flipper In The Forest
Forrest In Everyone S Life
Forty-Seven
Fourth Of July
Freezing Hands
Friendship Quotes
Frog Pun
Frog Story
Frogs And Will Power
From The Desk Of Martha Stewart
Fuck
Fucking Checking Account
Fucking Friend Poem
Fun Things To Do At Yard Sales
Fun At The Drive-Thru
Funky Monkey Story
Funny Daily Affirmations
Funny Science Test Answers
Funny Signs
Funny Translations
Game For When We Re Older
Gay Cartoon Characters
Genesis: Take Two
George W Bush S Familiarable Quotations
Getting Old
Ghost Story
Glass Eye
Gloves
God Bulletin Boards
God Money
God Proves Existence Via Chalk
God Vs Government
Good-Bye Daddy
Goody Two Shoes
Gross Grade School Rhymes
Groucho Marx Quotes
Guardian Angel
Guillotine
Halloween Costume
Halloween Party
Heaven Scent
Heaven Or Hell?
Hell - Exothermic Or Endothermic?
Helpful Tips To Make Life Simpler
Henry Ford And God Compare Notes
Her First Time
Her First Time 2
Hermaphrodite
Hillbilly Love Poem
Hippie And The Bus Driver
Hit Me One More Time Parody
Holding In Her Brains
Holiday Diet Tips
Honk If You Love Jesus
Horoscopes For Southerners
Hospital Room
Hot Tub Tips For Women
How Do I Love Thee - West Indian Style
How Far Does The Computer Date Back?
How Many College Students Does Is Take To Screw In A Lightbulb?
How Much Does A Prayer Weigh?
How Old Are You?
How They Do It When It Comes To Sex
How To Impress A Woman Compared To A Man
How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity
How To Sing The Blues
IRS Fraud Warning
I Am Canadian
I Love You In About Every Language
I Ve Learned
Idiots
If Only Men Would Listen
In Bed
Installing Husband 1 0
Installing Wife 1 0
Integrated Coke
Internet Lingo
Introduction To Chinese
Ivy League Ads
Jack Handyisms For Tots
Jennifer S Profound Questions Of The Week
Jesus Influenza Story
Jesus Vs Satan
Job Search Lingo
Jock Or Nerd?
Jokes About Guys
Just Us Girls
Justice
Kids Take On Marriage
Lawyer Jokes
Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes
Lesbian Quotes
Letter To A West Virginia Mother To Her Daughter
Letters To Landlords
Life Instructions
Life In Reverse
Life In The 1500 S
Life In The 90 S
Life Is Better Than Being An Egg
Little Johnny, What Element Do You Want?
Little Johnny
Little Mary
Love Goes Around
Magician
Mahatma Ghandi Joke
Managers Vs Engineers
Mark Twain And Spelling
Martha Stewart S Holiday Calandar
Mary Poppins Pun
Masturbation Song
Me Mudder
Meet The Jack Schitt Family
Melbourne Radio Show
Men Are Like
Mexican, Italian And Polish Lunch
Miracle Of A Brother S Song
Mirror, Mirror, On The Wall
Motherhood
Muscles To Smile
Music Addiction Test
Music Definitions
Music Test Funnies
Mutually Sadistic English Assignment
Natural Highs
Neil Armstrong Story
New Elements
Nostalgia Letter
Not So Deep Thoughts
Nuclear War: Tips For Survival
Old Pious Man
On-Line CD
On-Line Language
On The Differences Between Men And Women
One Dime
One Liners
One Liners From Women
Only In America
Only In California
Oops I Did It Again Parody
Overworked
Owed Too A Spell Checker (Alternate)
Parody Of A Chain Letter
Penis Promotion
Penis Statistics
Penis Tax
Performance Evaluations
Personal Ads
Phrases You Will Never Here In A Kentucky Home
Pick-Up Lines
Pillsbury Doughboy - Dead At 71
Pizza Anyone?
Plane Wreck In Cemetary
Plastic Surgery
Polish Virus
Politically Correct Ethnic Jokes
Pope And KFC Joke
Pre-Coital Agreement
Presidential Anagram
Pressed Leaf
Prison Vs School
Professor Sacks
Profound Questions
Psychiatrists Joke
Psychology Research
Public Bathroom Fun
Pumpkin Humper
Pun About Man Killing Wife
Punctuation
Punny Jokes
Punny Names
Railroad Gauge
Raising A Puppy
Random Thoughts
Randy The Rooster
Rape
Real Advertisements
Real Headlines
Real Instructions
Real Resumes
Reason To Take Up Drinking
Reasons For Not Doing Your Math Homework
Recipe For Love
Red Roses
Rejected Dr Suess Books
Rejection Lines
Resignation From Adulthood
Reversal Of The Sexes
Revocation Of Independence
Rocks
Room Service
Roosevelt Life Tips
Rules Of The Air
S H I T Training For Students
Santa Claus Meets The X-Files
Santa Claus Is A Woman
Sassy Things For Boys And Girls To Say
Scary Story
Scary Story With No Ending
Scooby-DOOBIE-Doo
Scream Chain Letter
Seminars For Women (Presented By Men)
Seven Basic Types Of Chain Letters (Alternate)
Seven Deadly Sins Of Gilligan S Island Theory
Sex According To Football
Sex Education
Sex Joke Involving Beard
Sex Jokes
Sex Jokes 3
Sexy Musical Instrument
She Was So Blonde
Shit - A Word Of Many (Ab)Uses
Sign Language
Sign Of The Times
Signs You Had A Bad First Date
Signs You Ve Been In Band Too Long
Signs Your Presidential Candidate Isn T Right
Silly Names
Sith Lord: Position Available Immediately
Six Feet
Six Great Lessons
Six Reasons Tinky Winky Can T Be Gay
Skipping Class Rationalizations
Sleeping With Mom
Smart Blonde
Snow Diary
Social Darwinism
Sotally Tober
Special Diet
Special Diet (Variation)
Stages Of Life
Starfish Parable
State Mottoes
Story Made Up Of 80 S Song Titles
Strange, Stupid And Dumb Laws In Illinois
Strange Facts
Strange Facts 2
Strange Facts 3
Stranger Than Fiction
Stumpy And Martha
Subliminal Messages
Suggestive Question
Supermodel Wisdom
Surrogate Father
Swedish Humor
Take Off My Clothes
Technologically Challenged
Telepathic Watch
Ten Signs You Picked The Wrong ISP
The 80 S
The Balloonist
The Bank Account
The Beer Song
The Best Things About Being A Girl
The Bible In 50 Words
The Birdies
The Doll And A White Rose
The Eighties
The English Language
The Fence
The Finger
The History Of The World AP Style
The Homosexual Agenda
The Ideal Resume
The Last 10 Things A Man And A Woman Would Say
The Living Dead
The Man Who Loved Beans
The Mathematics Of Relationships
The Movies
The New Priest
The Old Lady Bet
The Perfect Joke
The Perfect Worker
The Six Basic Types Of Chain Letters
The South
The Stock Market
The Taco Bell Chihuahua
The Top 14 Special Powers Of The Young Darth Vader
The Ugly Duckling
The World S Thinnest Books
Things Guys Think Girls Should Know
Things I Must Remember - By A Puppy
Things You Don T Want To Hear Over An Airline PA System
Things You Would Never Know Without The Movies
Things That Bother Me
Things To Do At A Boring Movie
Things To Do At The Mall
Things To Say At Thanksgiving
This Year S Freshmen
Three Jokes
Three Strong Mice
Tickle-Me Elmo Factory
Time For God
Tips For A Lifetime
Tipsey Fruit Cake Recipe (Alternate)
Tipsy Fruit Cake Recipe
Titanic (the Short Sarcastic Version)
Titanic S Last Mystery Revealed
To My Dear Girlfriend
To Women Everywhere From A Man Who S Had Enough
Tom Swifties
Top 10 Reasons Eve Was Created
Top 10 Slogans Rejected By Motel 6
Top 10 Summer Camps You Should Not Send Your Kids To
Top 10 Signs That You Know It S Time To Join E-mailers Anonymous
Top 11 Reasons To Go To Work Naked
Top 12 Pick Up Lines And Comebacks
Top 21 Things Not To Say When Pulled Over
Top 25 Signs That You Have Already Grown Up
Top 33 Sexually Suggestive Lines In Star Wars
Top 36 Seminars For Males
Top 50 Things To Say When You Catch Your Roomate Having Sex
Top Seven Fears Of The Fabric Softener Bear
Top Ten Elf Pick-Up Lines
Top Ten Reasons Trick Or Treating Is Better Than Sex
Top Ten Reasons It Sucks To Be A Dick
Top Ten Rejected Slogans For Firestone Tires
Top Ten Rejection Lines Given By Men And Women
Top Ten Sex Jokes
Top Ten Signs You Re At A Redneck Wedding
Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women
Top Ten Things Only Women Understand
Top Ten Ways Y2K Will Affect Disney World
Trojan Horse Warning
Trouble In Heaven
True Ending To The Empire Strikes Back
Truisms
Truth About Reindeer
Twas The Month After X-Mas (Dieters Version)
Twas The Night Before X-Mas (Computer Version)
Twas The Week After X-Mas (Y2K Poem)
Twelve Gay Days Of X-Mas
Two Assholes
Two Blonde Jokes
Two Indians And A Polack
Two Italian Men
Two Things To Worry About
Universal Grade Change Form
Urban Legends All In One Letter
Vacuum Salesman
Van Gough S Relatives
Versailles
Veterinarian
Vibrator
Vincentian Vs American
Vulgarity Test
WORK Virus
Ways To Tell You Re Too Drunk
Wedgewood Shooting
Weird Job Interviews
Weird Local Sex Laws
What Day Is Your Birthday?
What Do You Call Your Dick?
What Does Your Name Mean? (Mean Version)
What Guys Names Mean
What Guys And Girls Are Really Saying
What Men Really Mean
What Are Dogs And Cats Really?
What Do You Want In A Woman?
What S Your Screen Name Mean?
When Santa Runs Out Of Prozac
Where Is God?
Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
Why Dogs Are Better Pets Than Cats
Why Girls Like Guys And Vice Versa
Why God Never Got Tenure
Why I Fired My Secretary
Why Jesus Is Better Than Santa Claus
Why Nagging A Man Doesn T Work
Why We Should Feel Sorry For Tech Support
Wilbur And Martha
Windows 98 Southern Edition
Windows Errors In Haiku
Winter Wonderland Computer Parodies
Wisdom From The Bathroom Walls
Woman S Guide To Male Bashing
Women Rule
Women Are Bright Because
WordPerfect Helpline
Work Phrases
World S Shortest Books
Worms And Alcohol
Worst Analogies
Worst Country Songs
Y0K And Y1K Problems
Yo Mama So Stupid (and Ugly)
You Know You Re Getting Old When
You Know You Re An Idiot When
You Might Be A Yankee If
You Might Be From Lousiville If
You Might Have A Redneck Yard If
You Might Be A Redneck If
You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If
You Re Lost In The Generation Gap Between Baby Boomers And Generation X If
Yummy Fingers

