Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "you don't know
Jack Schitt". Now, You can handle the situation.
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer
magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Knee-deep Schitt, Inc.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and the deeply religious couple produced
6 children: Holie Schitt, The twins; Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt, Fulla Schitt,
Giva Schitt and Bull Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married for 15
years Jack and Noe divorced. Noe later married Mr. Sherlock and because her
kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was
known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a cowardly son, Chicken
Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout childhood and
consequently, married the Happens brothers in dual ceremony.
The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg, Byrd and Horse. Bull Schitt the prodigal
son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned with his new bride, Pisa
Now, when someone say's you don't know Jack Schitt, you can correct them.