A Tribute to Beer
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the
morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're
--William Butler Yeats
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you
to keep your mouth shut.
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it.
Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.
Drinking provides a beautiful excuse to pursue the one activity
that truly gives me pleasure, hooking up with fat hairy girls.
Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder.
Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all
of the time and have the time of your life.
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go
to heaven Sooooo, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven...
-- Brian O'Rourke
Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol
has taken out of me.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind
is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention,
but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.
I drink to make other people interesting.
--George Jean Nathan