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Reasons NOT To Get Married

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Reasons NOT To Get Married

Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is
not the only thing in life!!
* Anonymous

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An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older
she gets the more interested he is in her.
* Agatha Christie

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Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men
should be happier than others.
* Oscar Wilde

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Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
* Scottish Proverb

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I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
* Sam Kinison

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A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers
that your wife will give you for free.
* Anonymous

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Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't,
they'd be married too.
* H. L. Mencken

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Marriage is a three ring circus:
* engagement ring ---wedding ring ---suffering

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When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a
ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.

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Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

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I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"
She said, "Somewhere I have never been!"
I told her, "How about the kitchen?"

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We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

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My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours. That was only for the
estimate.

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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in!"

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Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to ever get
married. He says "the wedding rings look too much like miniature
handcuffs....."

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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling
at the front door, who do you let in first?
The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after you let him in!

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A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a
wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she
leaned
over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned
for a while but then smiled, "It really works!"

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Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After
marriage, the "y" becomes silent.

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It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It
only seems longer.
* Anonymous

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"A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle."
* U2

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"Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street bald and still think they are beautiful."

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A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can
spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to
forget it once.

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When a man is single, he's incomplete. When he's married, he's
finished
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User Comments
A dog is for life, a man is just for Christmas
marion on November 24, 2005 at 06:43
All women are whores, some just cost more than others
Keith on December 29, 2005 at 11:27
All women are whores, some just cost more than others
Keith on December 29, 2005 at 11:28
hey keith guess what your mother is a woman
hahaha on February 02, 2007 at 01:24
2007 acadia gmc www.volny.cz/acadia/
dealer on March 07, 2007 at 07:31
Yeah, but you can spent years trying to get rid of the O.L.D.M.A.N.
Nicky on March 09, 2007 at 03:47
How do you get a slut to stop having sex? Marry her!
WomanHater on March 24, 2007 at 01:55
Hey keith! if all women are whores then so is your grand-mum
Mellissa on March 25, 2007 at 12:25
woman deserve the death penalty for being woman
matt on April 09, 2007 at 12:28
What you don't have you don't need it now. U2
Thane on May 06, 2007 at 10:26
No man Really knows his wife he just pretends he does
Malik on June 09, 2007 at 10:09
Any female with a pussy between her legs is a fucken whore!
Steve on June 26, 2007 at 03:45
We can say manythings about women, but above all, they are the best
thing god created.
Benny on July 13, 2007 at 06:43
A moments light relief, from the day job, I am not friegthened off and
I am getting married next year. www.gb-legal.com
Adrian on August 06, 2007 at 08:30
Since when Benny. God may have made women but that was his only
mistake.
DarthGen on September 15, 2007 at 11:40
wow these guys seem to have bad feelings towards women...only guys
that think that are guys that have been rejected. so weither we are
whores or gods one mistake. we are here and you have to live with
us... one rejection at a time. sry fellas.. ps. im married and my
hubby told me to write this. to sry boys
dawn on September 20, 2007 at 01:47
really? well dawn, make it known that the one you call the "one
mistake" also made you as well! and who ate the fruit first? we
didn't! so don't apologize, that's like saying, "oops, i fucked up,
but you don't mind, do you?" so please, no apologies.
krazy j on September 30, 2007 at 02:37
Never trust a hole which is deeper....
Ihatewomen on October 21, 2007 at 11:11
what do you tell a woman that has 2 black eyes.... ....nothing she
hasn't been told twice already...
dahman on October 24, 2007 at 05:07
Dawn... I rarely get rejected by any women, but I can tell you I have
very little respect for any of them. Why? Simple.. Once a women
knows I am wealthy it is like a light switch going off in her head.
Instantly she becomes so much more interested in me than before. No,
it is not just SOME women, but all and dont tell me you are different
because you are not. The part that is the most annoying is where were
they when I was trying to earn the wealth?? No where to be found, and
dont give me this crap about "women want resources for having
children. Lets state the obvious... .You are lazy!! Also, marriage
provides very little for a man because it locks me down. The way it
is now is easy. When I get tired of you, I trade you in for someone
else. It is not cold, shallow, or mean, but just life.... Also, last
time I checked women where the ones who decided to evaluate themselves
by beauty...
Simain Jones on October 31, 2007 at 04:47
Every chick I've ever dated turned into a nut-case. I just kicked the
last one out 3 weeks ago. This time it only took 11 months before she
went from Sweetheart to C_ntzilla. And, i'm only $3000 in debt this
time. Hey!, I wise man once told me "you don't pay a hooker for sex,
you're paying a hooker to leave after sex.
Crazy-Chick Magnet on November 05, 2007 at 06:15
Wow. The fact that you can't discern the good from the bad is a little
unnerving. That's approx. half the population. NOT ALL women are like
this. It's a large and false generalization to say that all women are
golddiggers, lazy, or whores. I'm sorry that the women you have
encountered in your life have not been good to you. There are plenty
of good examples of self-sufficient, pure, good women out there. You
just have to focus on that and look for them! Peace :)
Cecilia on January 11, 2008 at 06:16
"Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street bald and still think they are beautiful." That's
disrespectful...female cancer patients do that...that makes them above
men.
AN on March 19, 2008 at 02:30
"Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street
bald and still think they are beautiful." I shaved my head and
have no problems walking around blad and proud. I get compliments on
my head, its shaped very nicely.
MD on April 25, 2008 at 10:04
Love is grand, divorce is a hundred grand.
Jeff on July 09, 2008 at 09:21
yeah its right
arong on July 21, 2008 at 12:29
women is all beautiful
kikay on August 21, 2008 at 09:05
I can't get enough of this. LOL funny... But there are some truths in
it. Take Note!
Joe on May 03, 2011 at 05:33
We were all created equal.
XxHearts on July 29, 2011 at 04:13
benny the great man yaar
amin on September 30, 2012 at 06:10

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