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How To Shower Men And Women Style

How To Shower Like a Woman



1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks


2. Walk to bathroom wearing long bathrobe. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror make mental note to do

more sit-ups.


4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,and pumice stone.


5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.


6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.


7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.


8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.


9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.


10. Rinse conditioner off hair.

11. Shave armpits and legs


12. Turn off shower


13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.


14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.


15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.


16. Return to bedroom wearing long bathrobe and towel on head.




How To Shower Like a Man




1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in >a pile.


2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the "woo-woo" sound.


3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.


4. Get in the shower.


5. Wash your face


6. Wash your armpits


7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.


8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.


9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.


10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.


11. Shampoo your hair.


12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.


13. Pee.


14. Rinse off and get out of shower.


15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.


16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.


17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.


18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.


19. Throw wet towel on bed.


-----

Another Version:

How to shower like a woman
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according tolights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note - must do more sit-ups.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with Grapefruit Mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair (you must make sure that it has all come off).

Shave armpits and legs.

Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.

Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you lose the water pressure.

Turn off the shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.

Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit, tweeze hairs.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas and then sashay to bedroom to spend and hour and a half getting dressed.

How to shower like a man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the "woo-woo" sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs (no).

Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror and scratch your ass.

Fart.

Get in the shower.

Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one). Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just rinse it off. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.

Majority of time is spent washing your privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap bar.

Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).

Make a shampoo Mohawk.

Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the mirror again.

Pee (in the shower).

Rinse off and get out of the shower.

Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub the whole time.

Partially dry off.

Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles, admire wiener size again.

Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.

Leave bathroom fan and light on.

Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist.

If you pass your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her, and make the "woo-woo" sound again.

Throw wet towel on the bed.

Get dressed in under two minutes.

Fart


Make the lady take of her towl
Sean on October 29, 2005 at 09:37
i usually say -well hello there!- wen I shake my weiner at my wife
david on December 15, 2006 at 04:15
when i shake my weiner at her ask if she wants some of it
kevin on February 01, 2007 at 09:12
loofas are odd, and why the hell would you need so many fucking soaps
Rose on February 12, 2007 at 03:17
Woo-woo lol
Woo-woo on February 15, 2007 at 09:49
i would wander why someone would decide to create a website that
explains to people how to showere. secondly sean is a disturbed
perverted little boy who doesnt understand that it is only writting on
this pageif she did there would be no benifit to any of us, and david
you dont actually have a wife do you, and nor will you ever until you
stop acting like a moron, kevin your never going to be in the position
to ask if she wants some of it, so grow up and come up with a better
chat line, rose you make a valid point however it doesnt matter for
this web page is the most pointless crap i have ever seen, with the
worst and most idiotic humor. i hope that you learn a lot from this
comment and stop being social retards. xxx
steve on March 12, 2007 at 01:24
LOL that was rather funny brightened up my day. I get all of that
every night save for him wobbling his weiner at me. Last time he did
that for no reason I flicked it stoped him real fast lol
Rachel on April 23, 2007 at 09:51
SHAKE DAT WENER AND PULL OF THE TOWEL OF YOUR WIFE THEN GET IN THE
SHOWER TOGETHER!!! LOL
WHOO WHOO on April 29, 2007 at 09:05
that'd be nice
yup on April 29, 2007 at 10:42
I hate in in every way not really it is awesome
bob on May 24, 2007 at 02:59
made the man suck in the girl boobs.
joe on June 01, 2007 at 01:17
eifonhreufvgeHRGNPIUAQNFG REQGPVOEUR4TGDAFBVGYWAETFJDSBCGEWYGF
Keith on June 07, 2007 at 01:47
make the girl suck on the mans nuts and let the man suck on the girls
boobs and then make out
nate on June 11, 2007 at 01:08
i like to suck on my husbands weiner after taking a shower
jasmine on June 25, 2007 at 05:10
Lol. If i ever shake my weiner at my chick, thats not all i'm doin..
>=) get it?.. get it?
DJ D Rick on August 04, 2007 at 01:37
steve, u sound like a woman. just bloody chill
Bud on February 18, 2008 at 10:44
fuck steve!ur sounds like an old stupid nanny .
claire on February 28, 2008 at 12:49
My wife likes sucking my weiner After I take my shower she helps me
dry off from the waste down, and then sucks on it hard, after she
moves all the pubic hair aside.
James on June 16, 2008 at 10:13
steve at first i thought that you were a women and when i saw that you
were a guy i thought thank you GOD that there are some decent men in
this world... and claire i guess your just not used to a gentleman
being in your life cuz thats what steve sounds like oh and james get
a life nobody wants to hear your perverted fantacies
spreckles on June 17, 2008 at 10:29
I think James and Jasmine are together... ANYWAY, this is
hilarious. I love it. Funnyy
Jessica on July 25, 2008 at 12:33
Haha... 1, 7, 13 (while still in the shower), and 17 off of the first
man's list are SO true. Clothes are never put in a hamper, a pile will
do. The blowing nose in hand thing I've never really thought twice
about till now. Peeing in the shower is something that no man doesn't
do. And I've always wondered why my wife is always getting after me
going "IS IT TOO HARD TO CLOSE THE CURTAIN AND PUT THE MAT THING BACK
IN, WHY DO YOU EVEN TAKE THE MAT OUT TO BEGIN WITH?!" Well, it hurts
my feet...
MagnusVerdus on January 19, 2009 at 11:53
Steven an ass
sex on February 06, 2009 at 05:34
After a shower, go to you're room and have sex with your husband and
wife go naked a around the house!!!!!!
~Natalie~ on July 01, 2011 at 05:16
this is all so true, from first step to last step is exactly what i do
except the leave ass hairs on soap, i don't use barred soap..., and
when my wife leaves her towl on i yank the corner of it so i can see
at least a little boob, who's with me?
Torin on October 03, 2011 at 03:51
wow completely wasted time. Pissing in the shower causes foot fungus.
Who came up with this stupid idiotic nonsense i feel stupier by having
read this. Also i am a man and have pissed in the shower to find that
out
incognito on January 24, 2012 at 09:22
Well first off i have no idea why i am here but its pretty interesting
now secondly I apparently shower like a woman except for the face
cloths and stuff.
SighGuy on February 12, 2012 at 05:33
i fuck her ass up...and then she rides my dick for a long time!
lol on January 03, 2013 at 06:49

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