Ms Automobile Gm

HomeFunplexComputer

MS Auto


At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the
computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If G.M. had kept up
with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving
twenty-five dollar cars that got one-thousand miles to the gallon." In
response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating,
"If G.M. had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving
cars with the following characteristics:



For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a
new car.

Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you
would just accept this, restart, and drive on.

Occasionally, executing a manner such as a left turn, would cause your
car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to
reinstall the engine.

Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car95" or
"CarNT." But then you would have to buy more seats.

Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five
times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would but would only run on
five percent of the roads.

The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would be
replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.

New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and
refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned
the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

G.M. would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand
McNally road maps (now a G.M. subsidiary), even though they neither need
them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause
the car's performance to diminish by fifty percent or more. Moreover, G.M.
would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.

Every time G.M. introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn
how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in
the same manner as the old car.

You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.



More Computer

  1. [page] 101 Things You Do Not Want Your System Administrator To Say
  2. [page] 10 Commandments Of Email
  3. [page] 10 Reasons You Know You Bought A Bad Computer
  4. [page] 10 Users
  5. [page] 10 Years Ago
  6. [page] 12-Step Internet Addiction Recovery Program
  7. [page] 1776 Computers
  8. [picture] 5MB Hard Disk In 1956
  9. [page] AOL Diary
  10. [page] A Confused Computer
  11. [page] A Poem For Computer Users Over 40
  12. [page] A Y2K Solution
  13. [page] Abbott Win95
  14. [page] Abort
  15. [page] Abrahams Computer
  16. [page] Actual Japanese Error Messages
  17. [page] Addicted To Vi
  18. [page] Alien Chain Letter
  19. [picture] Alphabet
  20. [page] Always Accessible
  21. [page] An Ode To Unix
  22. [page] Ancient Tech Support
  23. [picture] Antique PC
  24. [page] Aol City
  25. [page] Aol Dict
  26. [page] Aol Pie
  27. [page] Aol Xmas
  28. [page] Auctual Microsoft Helpdesk Conversations
  29. [page] Auto Remote Key
  30. [page] Ballad Y2k Gilligan Parody
  31. [picture] Bart Uses Google
  32. [page] Befuddled
  33. [picture] Bill Gates Car
  34. [picture] Bill Gates Reception Room
  35. [page] Bill Gates And The God
  36. [page] Britney Spears Vs Computer
  37. [page] Bumper Stickers
  38. [picture] Can I Have My Spider Back
  39. [page] Celebrity Computer Viruses
  40. [picture] Chalk Board
  41. [picture] Chat Pinocchio
  42. [page] Chatting With Girl Friends
  43. [page] Common Computer Acronyms
  44. [picture] Computer Better Than Everything
  45. [page] Computer Breasts
  46. [page] Computer Chat
  47. [page] Computer Diagnosis
  48. [page] Computer Exorcism
  49. [page] Computer Geek
  50. [page] Computer Gender
  51. [page] Computer Ho
  52. [page] Computer Humor
  53. [picture] Computer Keyboard Eraser
  54. [page] Computer Linterature
  55. [page] Computer Memory
  56. [page] Computer Nerd
  57. [page] Computer Prayer
  58. [picture] Computer Terminology
  59. [page] Computer Vs Air Conditioner
  60. [page] Conversation Gd Moses Comp
  61. [picture] Ctrl Alt Delete
  62. [page] Cup Holders
  63. [page] Customers Do Strangest Things
  64. [picture] Cyber Date
  65. [page] Diary Of An AOL User
  66. [picture] Drag And Drop
  67. [page] Dvorak
  68. [page] E-mail Addiction Signs
  69. [picture] Eating Mouse
  70. [picture] Ebay User With Lowest Feedback Score
  71. [page_white_flash] Email Forwarding
  72. [picture] Email From Heaven
  73. [page] Engineer Identification Test
  74. [page] Evil Tv
  75. [page] Evolution Of Product Documentation
  76. [page] Evolution Of A Programmer
  77. [picture] Extend Deadline
  78. [page] Feel Sorry For Tech Support People
  79. [picture] First Appointment
  80. [page] First Computer In Biblical Times
  81. [page] Flame Response Form
  82. [page] Floppies
  83. [picture] FreeBSD Fs Linux
  84. [picture] FreeBSD Kills Linux
  85. [picture] Funniest Gmail Phishing Email With Captcha
  86. [page] GM Makes Computers
  87. [page] Gates Coke Pointers
  88. [page] Getting To Know Your Computer
  89. [page] Girlfriend
  90. [page] Girlsfriend Version One
  91. [page] Gorilla And Computer
  92. [picture] HTML Tattoo
  93. [picture] Hands Free Cell Phone
  94. [picture] Hidden Settings
  95. [page] Hitching On Information Highway
  96. [picture] Homework
  97. [page] How Company Names Came About
  98. [page] How Was I Born
  99. [page] How It All Began
  100. [page] How To Pick Up Girls On Orkut
  101. [page] How To Be Annoying In The Computer Lab
  102. [picture] Hundreds Of Linux Boxes Booting On An Airplane
  103. [page] I Love You More Than My Computer
  104. [picture] I Love You Virus
  105. [page] If Aol Made Cars
  106. [page] If Architecht Programmers
  107. [page] If God Were A Computer Programmer
  108. [page] If People Bought Cars Like They Buy Computers
  109. [picture] Image Loading On Internet
  110. [page] Installing Love
  111. [picture] Intelligent Clip
  112. [page] International Calendar Y2k
  113. [page] Internet
  114. [page] Internet Cable Providers
  115. [page] Internet Junkie
  116. [picture] Internet Reality
  117. [page] Internet Virus Warning
  118. [page] Is Win95 A Virus
  119. [page] Jesus Saves
  120. [page] Jobless Man At Microsoft
  121. [page] Junk Mail 101
  122. [picture] Kill Windows
  123. [picture] Laptop
  124. [page] Laptops In Recent Movies
  125. [page] Learn From The Movies
  126. [picture] Linux Case
  127. [page] Linux Tech Call
  128. [page] Living In 2003
  129. [page] Lunch At HP
  130. [picture] MSN Messenger Smilies
  131. [picture] MS Word Clip
  132. [picture] MS Word Doggy
  133. [picture] MS Word Menu Tools
  134. [picture] Make A Web Site For Me For Free
  135. [page] Meanings Of Abbreviations
  136. [page] Men And Computers
  137. [page] Message From An ISP
  138. [page] Miceball
  139. [page] Microsoft Engineer
  140. [picture] Microsoft Hit Wizard
  141. [picture] Microsoft Tech Support Award Winner
  142. [page] Mike Tysons Computer
  143. [picture] Modern Life Work Home Play Sleep
  144. [picture] Mom Dad
  145. [page] Mom Understand Comp
  146. [page] Moron Computer Operator
  147. [page] Mr Or Mrs Computer
  148. [page] Ms Automobile Gm
  149. [page] Ms Mcdonalds
  150. [page] Ms Revenue Ads Error Messages
  151. [page] Ms Xmas
  152. [page] Murphys Law In Computers
  153. [picture] Nazis
  154. [page] Net Snoop
  155. [page] Never Marry A Software Engineer
  156. [picture] New Chinese MSN Messenger
  157. [picture] New Mouse For Men
  158. [page] New Ms Keyboard
  159. [picture] New Way To Print
  160. [page] Newsgroup Etiquette Emilypost
  161. [page] Nite B4 Y2k
  162. [picture] No Parking - Get Your Own Wireless Network
  163. [page] Nosmoke
  164. [picture] Office 1
  165. [picture] Office 2
  166. [picture] Office Assistant Suicide
  167. [picture] Office Suzie
  168. [page] Password
  169. [picture] Passwords Tattoo
  170. [picture] Perfume
  171. [picture] Picture Of Playstation Sold On Ebay
  172. [page] Programmers Of Chelm
  173. [page] Programming Languages Are Like Women
  174. [page] Recursive Acronym Or Self Referral Acronyms
  175. [page] Redneck Computer Lingo
  176. [page] Remember When
  177. [page] Restaurant Y2k
  178. [picture] Romeo Juliet
  179. [page] Sex Vs Computers
  180. [page] Signs Of Living In 2006
  181. [page] Smily
  182. [page] Soft Rev
  183. [page] Softrest
  184. [page] Software Engineering Glossary
  185. [page] Software Engineering Glossary From Marketing View
  186. [page] Star Trek N Computer Geeks
  187. [page] Sun Microsystems Sues Island Of Java
  188. [page] System Problem Report
  189. [page] Tech Support Butterdrive
  190. [page] Tech Support Calls
  191. [picture] Technology Age
  192. [picture] Technology For Country Folks
  193. [page] The Aircraft
  194. [page] The Amazing Health Computer
  195. [page] The Amphibious Princess
  196. [picture] The Best Anti Virus You May Ever Buy
  197. [page] The Hacker Test
  198. [page] The Internet Explained
  199. [page] The Life Of A Computer Analyst
  200. [page] The Seven Stages Of A Usenet Poster
  201. [page] The Top 25 Explanations By Programmers
  202. [page] Toaster Makers
  203. [page] Toasters
  204. [page] Top 10 Geek Quotes
  205. [page] Top 10 Notes Engineering School Did Not Teach
  206. [page] Top Ten Usenet Users
  207. [page] Turkish Computer Virus
  208. [page] Type Chainletter
  209. [page] Types Of Women
  210. [page] U Engineers
  211. [picture] Understanding Computer Technology
  212. [picture] Useful Key
  213. [picture] Useless Man
  214. [page] Usgov V Ms
  215. [page] Using Computers For A Gratuitous Screw Reference
  216. [page] Vacation Pay Y2k
  217. [page] Vanish VCR Tapes
  218. [page] Vision And Perseverance
  219. [page] WP Problems
  220. [page] Ways Things Would Be Different If Microsoft Was Headquartered In South Carolina
  221. [page] Web Drinking Game
  222. [picture] When Airplanes Run Microsoft Windows
  223. [page] Where Do The Deleted Characters Go
  224. [page] Which Type Of Woman Is Your Girlfriend
  225. [page] Why Windows 95 Is Called Windows 95
  226. [picture] WinXP
  227. [picture] Windaz 2000
  228. [page] Windows75
  229. [picture] Windows Copy
  230. [picture] Windows Crash
  231. [page] Woman Vs Computer Geek Joke
  232. [page] WordPerfect Helpline
  233. [page] Words From Techsupport
  234. [page] Y2K Mickey Mouse Song
  235. [page] Y2k Hairspray
  236. [page] Y To K Conversion
  237. [page] Y Zero K
  238. [page] Yk Atone Email
  239. [page] IPhone For Everyone