If Internet Companies Provided Cable Service
TV stations are starting to provide INTERNET access, but could you imagine
if INTERNET Service Providers were to provide CABLE?
All the most popular shows would just 'slow down' just because there were too
many people watching it at once.
The nudie channels would make you click your remote saying, "YES, I AM OLD
ENOUGH, LET ME SEE THE STUFF."
When you change channels, there'd be a 5 to 10 second wait with an hourglass
on the screen while the next channel is connected to. The more people watching
a show, the longer the hourglass stays there.
There'd be a "back" button on the remote so you can take another look at what
you just watched.
Sometimes your TV will complain it cannot "FIND" what you're looking for.
You'd be able to make your TV store the things you like, until it gets too full,
then you'd have to delete a few things.
There'd be an arrow on the screen blocking the view, and you'd have to slide
your remote control around on the coffee table just to change channels.
When you complain that you cannot connect your tv and get cable, or that the
Hourglass is just staying on the screen all the time, they'd say: "Well, were
busy now, that's the way it goes."
You'd be able to instantly be able to send messages to anyone else with a TV.
The downside of that is that ADVERTISERS would be able to instantly send
messages to everyone for free as well.
They would advertise, "All the TV you can watch for $20 a month!"
If you're having poor reception, the technical staff at the station would suggest
trying to reconnect again, turning your TV OFF and then ON again, Blaming the
problem on you, Getting you to re-program your TV, and then telling you that
your TV just isn't good enough and to buy one ten times as fast for about $3000.
New software for your TV will make it run slower and require hardware upgrades.
After about 1.5 years, your TV would be completely useless for watching, and
you'd have to go out and buy another TV for about $2500 dollars.
You'd have to hire a high school kid to help you set up and connect your TV.
They'd take one good COAX cable and split it up into 10000 smaller slower cables,
1 to each customer.
If you have 2 TV's, you'd be able to connect them and have your own Network.
The NEWS would be only 5% relevant, full of ads,and messages from people sending,
"me too" messages.
You could pay a lot for a TV now, or you could wait a few months for the price
to go down.
So I don't think I'll ever get cable from an Internet company... or buy a TV,...
TV stations are starting to provide INTERNET access, but could you imagine
if INTERNET Service Providers were to provide CABLE?
All the most popular shows would just 'slow down' just because there were too
many people watching it at once.
The nudie channels would make you click your remote saying, "YES, I AM OLD
ENOUGH, LET ME SEE THE STUFF."
When you change channels, there'd be a 5 to 10 second wait with an hourglass
on the screen while the next channel is connected to. The more people watching
a show, the longer the hourglass stays there.
There'd be a "back" button on the remote so you can take another look at what
you just watched.
Sometimes your TV will complain it cannot "FIND" what you're looking for.
You'd be able to make your TV store the things you like, until it gets too full,
then you'd have to delete a few things.
There'd be an arrow on the screen blocking the view, and you'd have to slide
your remote control around on the coffee table just to change channels.
When you complain that you cannot connect your tv and get cable, or that the
Hourglass is just staying on the screen all the time, they'd say: "Well, were
busy now, that's the way it goes."
You'd be able to instantly be able to send messages to anyone else with a TV.
The downside of that is that ADVERTISERS would be able to instantly send
messages to everyone for free as well.
They would advertise, "All the TV you can watch for $20 a month!"
If you're having poor reception, the technical staff at the station would suggest
trying to reconnect again, turning your TV OFF and then ON again, Blaming the
problem on you, Getting you to re-program your TV, and then telling you that
your TV just isn't good enough and to buy one ten times as fast for about $3000.
New software for your TV will make it run slower and require hardware upgrades.
After about 1.5 years, your TV would be completely useless for watching, and
you'd have to go out and buy another TV for about $2500 dollars.
You'd have to hire a high school kid to help you set up and connect your TV.
They'd take one good COAX cable and split it up into 10000 smaller slower cables,
1 to each customer.
If you have 2 TV's, you'd be able to connect them and have your own Network.
The NEWS would be only 5% relevant, full of ads,and messages from people sending,
"me too" messages.
You could pay a lot for a TV now, or you could wait a few months for the price
to go down.
So I don't think I'll ever get cable from an Internet company... or buy a TV,...
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