If you try to fail and succeed, what have
  you done? 
  How is it one careless match can start a
  forest fire, but it takes a whole box to
  start a campfire? 
  Why is the time when the traffic is slowest
  called rush-hour? 
  What's the speed of dark? 
  If physics can predict lottery numbers,
  why are they still working? 
  If you run backwards will you gain weight? 
  If Barbie is so popular, why do you need to
  buy her friends? 
  What happens when you get scared
  half-to-death twice? 
  Can a blind person feel blue? 
  How can a house burn up when it burns
  down? 
  Are you telling the truth when you lie in
  bed? 
  If your vacuum cleaner really sucks, is it a
  bad thing? 
  How do you know when a Smurf
  suffocates? 
  Despite the cost of living, why does it
  remain so popular? 
  If a word in a dictionary is misspelled, how
  would you know? 
  In Chinese why are the words for crisis
  and opportunity the same? 
  Why does X stand for a kiss? 
  Why does O stand for a hug? 
  Why is the alphabet in that order? 
  How does skating on thin ice get you into
  hot water? 
  Why are they called stands when there
  made for sitting? 
  Doesn't expecting the unexpected make
  the unexpected expected? 
  When cheese gets its picture taken what
  does it say? 
  Why are they called non-stick pans? Is
  there a law saying your not allowed to put
  sticks in them? 
  Why are a wise-man and a wise-guy
  opposites? 
  If work is so terrific how come they have
  to pay you to do it? 
  Should crematoriums give discounts for
  those who died in fires? 
  Is it possible to have a civil-war? 
  If the #2 pencil the most popular, why is it
  still #2? 
  Do tea makers have coffee breaks? 
  Can fat people go skinny-dipping? 
  Why do they announce power shortages
  on TV? 
  Do you need a silencer when you shoot a
  mime? 
  Why do you press harder on the
  remote-control when you know the
  battery is dead? 
  How can batteries die? 
  If its zero degrees tonight, and tomorrow
  its meant to be twice as cold, how cold
  will it be? 
  Why are buildings called buildings when
  there finished? Shouldn't they be called
  builts? 
  Why is abbreviated such a long word? 
  Why is it that when you tell a man there
  are 400 billion stars he will believe you, but
  when you tell him there's wet paint he has
  to touch it? 
  Who's cruel idea was it to put a 'S' in 'lisp'?
  Do you find it unnerving that what doctors
  do is called 'practice'? 
  Would a fly without wings be called a
  walk? 
  If a turtle doesn't have a shell is it
  homeless or naked? 
  Can vegetarians eat animal crackers? 
  Why do they sterilize needles for lethal
  injections?