Actual Excuses Notes From the Parents

EXCUSES

The following is a collection of "actual excuse notes from parents
(including spelling)" from the Office of Educational Assessment at
the University of Washington.

* My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today.
Please execute him.
* Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her
shot.
* Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29,
30, 31,32, and also 33.
* Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
* Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he
fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
* John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his
face.
* Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He
was hurt in the growing part.
* Megan could not come to school today because she has been
bothered by very close veins.
* Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
* Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea
and his boots leak.
* Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
* Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
* Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot
to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it
Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
* Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend
her funeral.
* My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She
spent a weekend with the Marines.
* Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold
and could not breed well.
* Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed
with gramps.
* Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.
* Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.
* Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever,
sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also
sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever
and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and
fever. There must be something going around, her father even
got hot last night.

User Comments

there all good excuse they just need to learn how to spell

nell on October 12, 2005 at 10:12

these freaks cant spell for their life

Jim on October 15, 2005 at 06:30

Some Parents Are really stupid.

Kim on October 17, 2005 at 10:21

Did they Graduate High School?!?

Bre on October 17, 2005 at 10:23

That last one was just plain sick!!!

dude on October 18, 2005 at 04:33

the 1 in bed with gramps is well good hahaha

jen on October 27, 2005 at 08:00

wow what retards

Rob on October 31, 2005 at 07:33

Gotta agree, one with Gramps is my fave and the one with January
having like "35" days really needs the concept of a calendar explained

Vince on November 01, 2005 at 01:24

ahahahz...omgsh su parentz r just so funny...

anjewl on November 02, 2005 at 09:36

maybe the problem is they did go to highschool

dee on November 09, 2005 at 01:59

wow these need to seriously be going back to school, lol i like the
one with the girl and "gramps"

Naoko on November 14, 2005 at 03:39

And I thought my parents were retarded!

Person on November 22, 2005 at 08:48

Pathetic! No one nows how to spell! This whole site sux! All there is
are horny bastards craving sex and religous loser!

Blackrose on November 23, 2005 at 08:37

whoa, and I thought I spelt bad, some of them use the wrong words to,
I think. Dude, this opened my eyes to how stupid adults are. hahah

Blue-Moon on December 09, 2005 at 04:28

wow! stupid ppl. n there is nothin wrong with being a horny
bastard.lol

LMoney on December 11, 2005 at 03:42

These are real stupid @$$E$

ID-E-UT on December 16, 2005 at 04:36

OMG!! These people are so stupid!

buffyrocks on December 22, 2005 at 01:56

DUMB AMERICANS....WHAT A SHAME AND NO COMMENT

HeRo on December 22, 2005 at 11:45

these people need to go back to elementary school!

smart-idiot on December 23, 2005 at 05:06

All Parents arent like this...but the majority are...

Aren on December 27, 2005 at 01:36

Hey, so like dudes, like yeah - parents are so like whoa!!! But like
really, you wanna job you do a job. hahaha

wannajob on December 31, 2005 at 02:05

they are all retards they dont even know how to spell gym its just a
f*cking 3 letter word and they dont know how to spell it only 1
comment they should go back to grade 1

bryan on January 04, 2006 at 02:41

yo people these excuses have been copied! if u type funny absent
letters there all the same exept the retard that added it cant spell

bryan on January 09, 2006 at 12:39

can i use 1 but i wish it was spelled right

geeee on January 10, 2006 at 08:55

i dont get it

memememe on January 12, 2006 at 06:51

i thought i was bad....these people are like 10 x worse than i am

mark on January 14, 2006 at 06:42

i think thw words arent spelt properly because they r pretending that
its the kids wrting the letters anyway! lol heya peeps good site xxxx

charlz on January 20, 2006 at 10:06

Stupid recheded humans...

Demon_Fire on January 24, 2006 at 05:02

lol that one wid gramps was hell funny oh and the perants suck at
spelling

funny_guy on October 05, 2006 at 08:10

note to welfare office; We are charging Troy $300 a month room and
broad.

Sue on October 15, 2006 at 03:39

lol, Those were funny! Bryan, you're SUCH a kill-joy.

AllieCat on October 30, 2006 at 04:57

yeah brian, what gives. Chillax,to the max. don't break a sweat, or
you'll make yourself wet. yeah, I'm a rhyming G-unit and I'm here to
stay yeah. just tak a chill pill man chillax, loosen up, don't be a
party pooper

coooooolio on November 16, 2006 at 10:15

Will the spaz who wrote Bryan a million times PLEASE get a life!

izmoe on November 30, 2006 at 04:18

THEY CANT SPELL FUK ALL HAHAHHAHA PLEASE EXSCUE JOHN FROM JIM WTF ITS
GYM M8 U ASS HOLE!!!!!!!!

sammm on December 12, 2006 at 01:20

Demon_Fire spelled "Wretched" wrong...

Amoeba_man on December 19, 2006 at 04:15

cooooooolio, u hav been added to wardogg's retarded bitch list, stop
postin shitty comments and get a fukin life.

CN5087 on December 22, 2006 at 12:01

gosh my parents arnt like that holy fuk they cant spell for shit jim
its gym

jppppppppp on January 04, 2007 at 04:48

I like the one that says :"Please excuse Mary for being absent
yesterday. She was in bed with gramps." lol Gramps...Cramps u fuk lol
but funny

sexxy blondd on January 15, 2007 at 09:49

hahaa!! Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.
hahahahaa! funny! shitzz lol, i wish my mom was like that! writin
notes like this shittttzzz

lauren says you suck on January 30, 2007 at 02:49

coolio has a very stupid comment... i really don't think these parents
had their kinder garten diploma....

Dj_me on March 10, 2007 at 08:19

wow that is completely embarrasing. i wonder if child read it and
decided not to hand it in. lol

jen-non thee less on March 16, 2007 at 09:23

lauren, you wish your mom was under the doctor also, thats attractive.

shammoo on April 21, 2007 at 05:45

WOW THESE PARENTS NEED TO GO BACK TO PREK AND GET THEIR LANGUAGE
STRAIGHT

NAYNAY on May 06, 2007 at 05:55

ohhh dear

tismeee on May 10, 2007 at 09:00

Americans....teehee, funny.

Carmen on May 10, 2007 at 06:33

As a teacher, these are not so unusual!! lol

Moi on May 19, 2007 at 02:36

Maybe Most of these parents speak another language other than English
so they don't know how to read & write English very well. Their
children attend an English school where the teachers speak, read and
write English only, so the excuse notes has to be written in .... you
know... English Mystery Solved ? ? ?

Mi on May 29, 2007 at 05:41

Yes people, forget about criticizing the parents for their spelling
and enjoy the humor in it all ! Isn't that what this site is all
about.... to look at the funnier side of life... don't be so
serious... laugh a little... ha ha ha

dai on May 29, 2007 at 05:54

Ha ha ha This stuff is so funny that it made me laugh out loud! I had
to go back and read them all for the second time and it made me laugh
again!

Genni on May 29, 2007 at 05:58

I didn't realize what was wrong with the January one until I read
someone's comment over and over and over again. That was really
funny. Wow.

Emily on June 05, 2007 at 02:21

lool... I loved the "Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his
father's fault." hahahaha. So true.

Sergio on June 06, 2007 at 02:03

lmao i liked the January one and the Gramps one

Jess on June 28, 2007 at 01:32

hah! I love the one with the Sunday paper.

bumblebre on July 12, 2007 at 12:29

lmao couldnt breed well =D

fizzle on July 21, 2007 at 07:57

"Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her
funeral." ???????? HAHAHAHAHA

DG on August 17, 2007 at 03:44

All those are shit andn peffetic mates, i heard far better innit, i
just spent 8 min blud of waste time, i will get my bambook on ya all,
ha ha ha blud now thats funny innit, safe tab back

sammy G on November 19, 2007 at 12:45

I love playing doctor don't you

Chris on December 24, 2007 at 08:28

lol!!!!! funny!! = )

kelso g lol = ) on December 29, 2007 at 12:16

I want to be a doctor when i grow up!! too bad I'm only 6 years old.FU

pooperscooper on January 22, 2008 at 11:39

Fu ALL go to helldamn

FENDERSTRAT on January 22, 2008 at 11:57

these parents are
asssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
ssssssssssssssses

fucker12 on January 24, 2008 at 11:30

this is the best excuse notes ive ever sceen. vkm we will survive

poopalachi on January 24, 2008 at 11:30

The kid's parents at my school in which I dictate are just as
retarted, ignorant, and fuckers as these parents!

Malpus Corner Principle on January 24, 2008 at 11:32

i have a dream! it is that these parents go to rehab.

deedeedadoodooihaveyomamafordinnerlastnight on January 24, 2008 at 11:34

i want to have sex with girls!

sex pistol on January 24, 2008 at 11:35

ill tell you what yall keep actin afool and i will get you on monday

illtellyouwhat! on January 24, 2008 at 11:36

ugly= yo mama

oollalla on January 24, 2008 at 11:37

This wetb site is insulting to uth parenths

Parent on January 24, 2008 at 11:38

say hello to my little friend, no really he's only 3 foot tall with an
m16 in his hand and he's mad

kakaroach on January 24, 2008 at 11:40

I wana do it with who ever wrote this web site!

Hotgirl on January 24, 2008 at 11:40

konichiwa sons of makatosh yoshi says konichiwa to yo mamas wawakilana
at 12:00 at wawa

yamatikashi on January 24, 2008 at 11:42

This site only proves that America will never survive! HaHaHAAA!
Love Sadam Husaine

Iraq on January 24, 2008 at 11:42

On #3, six days are listed, but there are only five school days. WTF?

Chris Brack on January 24, 2008 at 06:17

hi,funny comments as d brain of people who spelled them.i think that
we shouldnot blame them bcz these r their ip,just avoid them

the one on June 26, 2008 at 03:16

gawd i wonder who taught them how 2 spell. th 1 w/ the hangover was
stupid bcause teens aren't sposed 2 drink much less tel their parents.
THESE EXCUSES CRACKED ME UP!!!!!!!!!!:)

reggie on June 27, 2008 at 06:26

its really funny, but u should jus laugh and keep the insultations to
urself!

mona on March 18, 2009 at 02:59

all i can say is, oh wow...

kirsten on May 26, 2009 at 08:43

Wow, if these are the parents...wonder what the children are like?
Products of the educational system in the U.S.

Amanda on July 16, 2009 at 07:59

Why do people always put dumb posts on these things. people actually
want to give feedback but there always has to be one dumb ass who has
to be the 'funny guy' and write something stupid. i like the letters
because they are funny specially the january one but when i read the
comments i don't want to waste time reading something thats nothing to
do with the article. seriously u people are disgusting and utterly
stupid, and obviously don't have a life if your leaving comments on
sex. GET A LIFE!!

Pissed off on August 22, 2009 at 01:45

you are all pretty sad really cuz why would you want to look on a site
like this? i only did cuz someone said have a look. u r all fucking
retards

ya mum on September 09, 2009 at 07:13

Actual Excuses Notes From the Parents

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