- Q: What's the working title of Bob Woodward's new book?
A: "All the President's Semen"
- Q: What's the difference between Zippergate and Watergate?
A: This time we know who Deep Throat is.
- Q: Have you heard the latest poll? 10,000 American women
were asked if they'd sleep with
A: And 80% said, "not AGAIN!"
- Q: Why did Monica Lewinsky go to the White House General
A: To buy some Presidential Kneepads.
- Q: Have you seen the newest Washington souvenir?
A: It's a T-shirt that says "I blew the president, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!"
- Q: Why did Clinton meet Lewinsky in the Oval office?
A: It was so she could debrief him.
- Q: What's the difference between the Titanic and President
A: Only 1,500 people went down on the Titanic.
- Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and Bob Dole have in common?
A: They were both upset when Bill finished first.
- Clinton didn't tell Monica Lewinsky not to lie in
He told her not to lie in that position.
- Q: What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
A: When Hillary is out of town.
- Q: How does Bill keep Monica Lewinsky away from the White
A: He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her a ride.
- Q: What does Bill say to Hillary after a romantic interlude?
A: "Honey, I'll be home in 20 minutes."
- Q: Why does Bill Clinton cheat on Hillary?
A: He wants to be on top.
- Q: How did Bill Clinton paralyze Hillary from the waist down?
A: He married her.
- Q: How many women does it take to satisfy Bill Clinton's
A: It Takes A Village!
- Q: What was Yasser Arafat's advice to Bill Clinton?
A: Goats don't talk.
- Q: When did Clinton realize Paula Jones wasn't a Democrat?
A: When she didn't swallow everything he presented.
- Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and a gigolo?
A: A gigolo can only screw one person at a time.
- Q: What's the definition of an Arkansas Virgin?
A: A girl that can run faster than the Governor.
- Q: What does Teddy Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes HE
A: A dead girlfriend.
- Q: Why is Clinton so interested in events in the Middle East?
A: He thinks the Gaza Strip is a topless bar.
They're playing a new game at the White House: Swallow the leader.
President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.
"What is it?" exclaims the President.
"It's this Abortion Bill Mr. President," the aide replies. "What do you want to do about it...?"
"Just go ahead and pay it," responds the President.
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- 1992 Presidential Election
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- 6 Presidents
- A Clinton Anniversary Discovery
- A Day On The Presidential Campaign Trail
- A Look Ahead: Some Predictions For 1999
- A Purpose For Government
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- Al Gore S Concession Speech
- Answer To Bush Hitler 1a
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- As I Was Saying
- Bibi Light Bulb Joke
- Bill Clinton Poll
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- Bill Clinton S Retirement Plans
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- Bill Gates Give Coke Some Pointers
- Bill Vs Monica In Biblical Times
- Bomb Iraq
- Brain Surgery
- Brought To You By The Letter W
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- Bush Loses His Watch
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- Campaign Slogans For Hillary Clinton
- Can You Guess Who?
- Chelsea Clinton Looking For Love
- Chelsea At College
- Classroom Visit
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- Clinton Speech Translator [Pre Monicagate]
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- Closing Arguments
- Congress Embraces Internet Technology In Campaign Finance Reform
- Congressional Behavior
- Congressmans Money
- Constitutional Amendment To Ban All Pies Except Apple
- Conversation Between Condoleezza Rize And George Bush
- Current Events
- Cutting Down The Presidential Timber
- Dear Al
- Dear Diary: The Morning After In New Hampshire 2000
- Dear Mr Hinkley
- Dear Tide
- Democrat Light Bulb Joke
- Democratic Kittens
- Diary Of A Federal Employee
- Disney Supports New Solution To Status Of Jerusalem
- Dubbya Keeps Up With The Law
- Example Of Tragedy
- Excising Florida
- Family History
- Feminist Agenda
- Florida Lottery
- Football As A Political Paradigm
- Forget The News, Full Sleaziness Ahead
- Fry Tim McVeigh
- Fundamentalist Aesopians Interpret Fox-Grapes Parable Literally
- Future News For The Election
- GWB Appoints Hannibal Lecter Surgeon General
- George W Bush Quotes
- George W And Moses
- George W At The Pearly Gates
- George Washington And The Cherry Tree -- The New Versions
- Georgy Bush
- Good Luck, George
- Goodbye Bubba S Jeans
- Gore S Unreleased Concession Speech
- Government Official Customer Service Card
- Governmental X-mas
- Holiday Changes
- Hotmail Inbox Of George Bush
- House Resolution -- A Supposedly True Story
- How Government Works: The Night Watchman
- How Things Change
- How To Be A Good Democrat
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- I Believe
- Ice Fishing
- If Elian Gonzalez Was Jewish
- If The Republicans Controlled PBS
- Impeachment Trial Will Infringe Upon The Sabbath
- Independence Revocation
- Independent Political Parties That Didn T Make It
- Iraq Explained
- Israeli Economic Planning
- Israeli Rhetoric
- Janet Reno S Pet Peeves
- Justice Department Suit Against Microsoft
- Keeping The Peace -- Clinton Style
- King David Admits To Adultery, Murder Of Servant
- Language Problem
- Last Wishes
- Leftover 1999 Israeli Election Stickers And Signs
- Letter From The Smithsonian
- Liberals Vs Conservatives
- Libertarians Vs Anarchists
- Lincoln-Kennedy Coincidences
- Missing Piece
- Monica S Wish
- Mortgage Phone Call
- My Favorite Things - The Bill Clinton Version
- New Developments With Iraq
- New Evidence Shows Clinton Pardoned Hitler, Satan, Self
- New Hampshire Voters Suddenly Lonely
- New Internet Crisis
- New US Emblem
- New York State Bumper Sticker
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- Notice Of Revocation Of Independence
- Notice Of Revocation Of Independence --
- OJ Traffic Jam
- Other New York Senate Candidates
- Palestinians Kidnap Martha Stewart
- Partisan Software
- Pens In Impeachment Had Misprint
- Political Bumper Stickers
- Political Holidays
- Political Periodic Table
- Politically Correct Alphabet
- Politics: It All Boils Down To This
- Poof, No More Soft Money
- Possible Vice-Presidential Running Mates Er Maybe Not
- Potential Y2K Problems
- Practice Makes Perfect -- How George W Bush Got Through The Debates
- Presidency Test
- President Clinton: The Screenplay
- President Gore Reminisces
- President Push Fetus And Feces
- Punt The Pundits
- Quiz For Students In Kansas Public Schools
- Reasonable Link
- Report: Hostess May Have Marketed Unhealthy Twinkies To Minors
- Republican Euphemisms For Impeaching The President
- Republican Heritability
- Republican Light Bulb Joke
- Republican Test
- Republicans And Democrats
- Resume Of George W Bush
- Revelations In Barbara Walters Interview With Monica
- Revocation Of Your Independence
- Rudy In Reverse
- Scandal Of The Language Of Scandal
- Shame And You
- Sick Chelsea
- Signs Your Presidential Candidate Is Underqualified
- Special Afghanistan Cruise
- Speeches From The Throne
- Starr Opens Drive To Get Thomas Jefferson Off Mount Rushmore
- Starr Subpoenas 500-Year-Old Inca Mummy
- Supply-Sider Light Bulb Joke
- The Clinton Chain Letter
- The Cup Of Coffee
- The Dangers Of Bread
- The Differences Between Republicans And Democrats
- The First Draft Of George W S Inauguration Speech
- The Gingrich That Stole Congress
- The Kittens
- The Letter D Leaves Sesame Street
- The Modern Ten Commandments
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- The Referendum On Arcane And Confusing Election Referenda
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- The Second Attack On Iraq Explained
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- The Top 15 Florida Excuses For Holding Up The Election
- The Tragic Comedie Of King Leer
- The Washington Hillbillies
- The Wonders Of Medical Medicine
- The World According To Americans
- Then I Put Monicas Head Down Like This
- Things Bill Clinton Would Say If He Was In Star Wars
- Titanic Vs Clinton
- Tobacco Settlement FAQ
- Top Ten Hillary Clinton Senate Campaign Slogans
- Top Ten Reasons Why Newt Gingrich Should Be Reelected Speaker
- Top Ten Things Bob Dole Said While Growing Up
- Top Ten Ways Hillary Clinton Could Improve Her Image
- Top Twelve Rudolph Giuliani Gestures To Please Jewish Voters
- Types Of Feminists
- US-Iraqi Policy
- USA Vs Santa Claus
- US Army Official Voice Mail Message
- US Congress
- US Sues G-d For Monopoly Of The Universe
- Veni, Vidi, Vici
- Voting Decisions
- What About Whiskey?
- Which Candidate To Vote For?
- World According To The USA
- You Might Be A Democrat If
- You Might Be A Conservative If
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