One day a farmer was sitting around with one of his buddies, when he
came up with the problem that he couldnt get his cows to mate. The
other farmer said well what you have to do is stick your arm up the
female cow and smear it all over the male's face.
Believing what his buddy said he tried out this method and within days
his cows were having sex. He wondered if this would work on him and
his wife, so one night he managed to put his arm into his wifes
''special area'' and he wiped it all over his face. He started
yelling, ''Honey! Honey! Get up, you have to see this!'' When she woke
up and looked at him she said, ''What -- you woke me up to tell me
your nose was bleeding?''