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Homer Simpson
- We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those
"Police Academy" movies?
For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughin',
did...
- Stealing?! How could you?! Haven't you learned anything from that
guy who gives those sermons at church?
Captain What's-his-name?
-- Homer Simpson
Marge...
- Aw, Dad, you've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man,
and
old people are useless.
-- Homer Simpson
...
- Homer: Little baby batter,
Can't control his bladder!
Burns: Mmm...Crude, but I like it. What do you say...
- Homer: Hey, Flanders, it's no use praying. I already did the same thing,
and we can't both win.
Flanders:
Actually, Simpson...
- Asleep at the switch! I wasn't asleep! I was drunk!
Homer Simpson
Homer the...
- Hey! Let's do that 2,000-pound man thing. I'll be that Carl Reiner guy,
and you be what's-his-face.
-- Homer Simpson
...
- Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time.
Just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow...
- Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday?
I
mean, isn't God everywhere?
-- Homer Simpson
...
- And anyone can be tooted?
-- Homer Simpson,
on tutoring
The Way We...
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