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Limericks
- I wooed a stewed nude in Bermuda,
I was lewd, but my God!
she was lewder.
She said it was crude
To be wooed...
- There was a young sailor from Brighton
Who said to his girl,
"You`re a tight one."
She replied, " `Pon my soul...
- A young woman got married at Chester,
Her mother she kissed and she blessed her.
Says she, "You`re in luck,
He's a stunning good fuck...
- There was a young lady of Dover
Whose passion was such that it drove her
To cry,
when you came,
"Oh dear! What a shame!
Well, now...
- There was a young fellow named Goody
Who claimed that he wouldn't,
but would he?
If he found himself nude
With a gal...
- A pansy who lived in Khartoum
Took a lesbian up to his room,
And they argued all night
Over who had the right...
- There was a young plumber of Leigh
Who was plumbing a girl by the sea.
She said, "Stop your plumbing,
There`s somebody coming...
- Said a lecherous fellow named Shea,
When his prick wouldn't rise for a lay,
"You must seize it, and squeeze it,
And tease it,...
- My back aches. My penis is sore.
I simply can't fuck any more.
I'm dripping with sweat,
And you haven't come yet...
- The spouse of a pretty young thing
Came home from the wars in the spring.
He was lame but he came
With his dame like a flame...
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