Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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If I were not a professional, and an android, I would be insulted.
-- Data to Geordi, "The Icarus Factor", stardate 42686.4...
If I were rich my butler would answer my mail.
If I were truly original, I'd think of something cute.
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one? -- Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)
If I were you, I'd be different.
If I were you I'd dance naked in the middle of the street just to embarrass you.
If I were you, who'd be me?
If I wished to punish a province, I would have it governed by philosophers. -- Frederick the Grea
If Jack's in love, he's no judge of Jill's beauty.
If Jesus came back today, and saw what was going on in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.
-- Max Von Sydow's character in Woody Allen's Hannah and Her Siste...

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