Miscellaneous Collections

How many monkeys -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to do it and one to scratch his bum. (with eternal thanks to David Cutmore for this timeless classic....
How many Monty Python fans -- does it take to change a light bulb?
How many Mormons -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Six, one to screw it in and the other five to serve refreshments....
How many mothers in law -- does it take to change a light bulb?
A hundred. One to change it and the other ninety nine to say, "I told you so!...
How many movie directors -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but he wants to do it thirty-two times and when he's done everyone thinks that his last light bulb was much better....
How many MP's -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Twenty-one. One to change it and twenty to form a fact-finding committee to learn more about how it's done....
How many MS tech supports -- does it take to change a light bulb?
"The light bulb doesn't work? You must be using a non-standard socket....
How many MTV cartoon characters -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Butthead : "Uh huh huh huh huh. You said "Screw." Beavi...
How many MTV cartoon characters -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Butthead: Uuuuuuuuhhhhhh, HOW? Beavis : I dunno know....
How many MTV cartoon characters -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Errrrrrr... Uh-huh-huh-huh Light Bulbs suck or something....

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