Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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I BET WHAT HAPPENED was they discovered fire and invented the wheel on the same day.
Then that night, they burned the wheel. -- Jack Handley, The New Mexican, 1988....
I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick heavy brows.
Then they would get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hu...
I bet you have fun chasing the soap around the bathtub.
-- Princess Diana, to a one-armed war veteran during a visit to a London veterans hospital...
I bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. -- Stephen Wrigh
I braved the contempt of my friends last week and ventured out to see Bambi, the Disney rerelease that is proving to be a hit once again in the box office.
I was looking forward to a gentle, soothing...
I call them as I see them. If I can't see them, I make them up. -- Biff Barf
I called my parents the other night, but I forgot about the time difference.
They're still living in the fifties. -- Strange de Jim...
I came, I saw, I deleted all your files.
I came out of twelve years of college and I didn't even know how to sew.
All I could do was account -- I couldn't even account for myself. -- Firesign Theatre...
I came to MIT to get an education for myself and a diploma for my mother.

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