- One day Jesus was walking by the pearly gates when St.
Peter asked him to watch the gates for a few minutes... - God decided he needed a vacation. One of his aides suggested Venus.
"Forget it," God said. "I went there 10,000 years... - The doctor wanted to write a prescription, so he reached in his pocket and
pulled out a thermometer.
"Shit," he muttered, "Some asshole has my pen... - Three nuns die and go to heaven,
at the pearly gates they are confronted by Saint Peter... -
... - Q: How can you tell the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
A: By the taste... - Q: What did Tarzan yell when he saw the elephants coming?
A: The elephants are coming!!!... - Q: Why did they stop the leper hockey game?
A:
There was a face off in the corner... - Q: How do you sink a polish submarine.
A:
Knock on the door!... - Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?
A: The bucket...
