Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

Home › Fortune Cookies › Miscellaneous Collections

I suppose you expect me to talk." "No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die." -- Goldfinge
I tell them to turn to the study of mathematics, for it is only there that they might escape the lusts of the flesh.
-- Thomas Mann, "The Magic Mountai...
I tell ya, drugs never worked out for me. The first time I tried smoking pot I didn't know what I was doing.
I smoked half the joint, got the munchies, and ate the other half. Well, the first time...
I tell ya, gambling never agreed with me. Last week I went to the track and they shot my horse with the opening gun.
Well, just last week I was at a Chinese restaurant and when I opened my fortune c...
I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right. When I put on my shirt the button fell off, when I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off, I tell ya, I was afraid to go to the bathroom.
-- R...
I tell ya, I was an ugly kid. I was so ugly that my dad kept the kid's picture that came with the wallet he bought.
-- Rodney Dangerfield...
I think... I think it's in my basement... Let me go upstairs and check. -- Esche
I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
Well, what we have on our hands here is a dead shark. -- Woody Alle...
I think all right-thinking people in this country are sick and tired of being told that ordinary, decent people are fed up in this country with being sick and tired.
I'm certainly not! But I'm sick...
I think he said 'Blessed are the cheesemakers.'" "Nonsense, he was obviously referring to all manafacturers of dairy products.
-- The Life of Bria...

< previous

10396