- The candle is more traditional, and it uses no electricity.
- I'm not about to touch anything that has WATT written on it!
- Q:" How many Americans does it take to replace a light bulb?
"A:" One. "A:" Two - One to replace it and one to tell him it was burned out (in states that still have car-inspection laws).... - Q:" How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
"A:" Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!... - Q:" How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
"A:" Two - one to hold the giraffe, and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.... - Q:" How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
"A:" Two - one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.... - Q:" How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
"A:" That depends on whether it has health insurance.... - Q:" What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
"A:" You can unscrew a light bulb.... - Q:" How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?
"A:" Three - one to get the bulb and two to get the phone number to dial one of their subordinates to actually change it....

