A man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a beer. So he's sitting there contemplating life when he notices this great piano music playing. He looks around, and there's no piano, no band and no speakers. So he ask's the bartender where the music is coming from. The bartender says "I 've got a little man, who's about a foot high and he plays a little tiny piano under the counter."
The man doesn't believe him so he looks under the counter and sure enough there is a little man who's about a foot tall. The little man waves and asks if the man has any requests. The man is totally amazed. And he asks the bartender where he found the little man.
The bartender says "Well the other day I was taking out the garbage and I found a vase in the alley. So I picked it up and wiped off the dirt, and waddya know, a genie appears and says " I'll grant you one wish, any wish, but only one wish!" So here I am and I've got this little guy who plays the piano."
The guy asks what happened to the vase. The bartender says it's still out in the alley. The guy runs out the back door and looks for the vase. He picks it up and rubs it and the genie appears and says "I'll grant you one wish, any wish, but only one wish." So the man says "I want a million bucks." Snap!Poof! The alley is filled with a million quacking, shitting ducks. The man runs back in side and tells the bartender "That genie has a hearing problem! I asked for a million bucks and I get a million ducks!"
The bartender says "Yeah, no shit buddy. Do you really think I asked for a twelve inch pianist??!!"