Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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If you want my advice, pay me!
If you want someone to keep a secret, keep it yourself.
If you want something done, ask a busy person.
If you want something done properly, kill Baldrick before you start.
-- Edmund Blackadder -- Dish and Dishonesty...
If you wants to get elected president, you've got to think up some memorable homily so's school kids can be pestered into memorizin' it, even if they don't know what it means.
-- Walt Kelly, The Pogo...
If you want the best seat in the house, move a cat.
If you want the best things to happen in corporate life you have to find ways to be hospitable to the unusual person.
You don't get innovation as a democratic process. You almost get it as an anti-d...
If you want the last word with a woman, apologize.
If you want to annoy your neighbors, tell the truth about them. -- Pietro Aretino
If you want to avoid problems, never become good friends with an animal, since it lasts but a short while.
On the other hand, never become friends with men, they last too long!...

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