Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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How can you tell if your car is a lemon? Your car might be a lemon if
1) You can't get your glove compartment closed because of all the repair receipts....
How can you tell the dance from the dancer?
How can you tell the difference between men's real gifts and their guilt gifts?
Guilt gifts are nicer....
How can you tell there's anything out there? The door's closed.
-- The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy...
How can you tell when a little moron has been using your terminal?
There's white-out all over the screen....
How can you tell when sour cream goes bad?
How can you waste beer like that!! Don't you realize there are sober children in Africa!!
How can you work when the system's so crowded?
How can you write if you can't cry? -- Ring Lardne
How charming is divine philosophy! Not harsh and crabbed, as dull fools suppose, But musical as is Apollo's lute, And a perpetual feast of nectar'd sweets Where no crude surfeit reigns.
-- John Milto...

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