Sign on a front door: "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog.
Sign in an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
Sign on a scientist's door: "Gone fission.
Sign in a taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff.
Sign in a podiatrist's window: "Time wounds all heels.
Sign in a butcher's window: "Let me meat your needs.
Sign on used car lot: "Second hand cars in first crash condition.
Sign on fence: "Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive.
Sign in a car dealership office: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.
Sign over a cannibal's hut: "I never met a man I didn't like.