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Learn to Speak Chinese in 5 Minutes

send this to you in an effort to improve our culture literacy.

The first line is an English phrase; the second is its Chinese translation..



He's cleaning his automobile. Wa Shing Ka.

This is a tow-away zone. No Pah King.

Is there a fugitive here? Hu Yu Hai Ding?

Small horse. Tai Ni Po Ni.

Your price is too high! No Bai Nut Ding!

Did you go to the beach? Wai Yu So Tan?

It's very dark in here. Wai So Dim?

I bumped into a coffee table. Ai Bang Mai Ni.

I thought you were on a diet. Wai Yu Mun Ching?

Has your flight been delayed? Hao Long Wei Ting?

Your body odor is offensive. Yu Stin Ki Pu.

They have arrived. Hia Dei Kum.

You know lyrics to the Macarena? Wai Yu Sing Dum Song?

I got this for free. Ai No Pei.

Phew! Does this bathroom stink! Hu Flung Dung?

Stay out of sight. Lei Lo.

You have a good sense of humor. Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!


User Comments
im chinise and i find this offensive so expect 2 hear frm my lawyer.
john on March 02, 2007 at 02:47
this is very dumb!!! how can these sentence can learn how to speak
chinese,,, you should put like please, thank you stuuf like that
russeni on March 06, 2007 at 08:36
i am a chinese, why those pronounciation didn't make any sense for
me?!
cissy on April 08, 2007 at 05:53
that is cool chinese
aallii on April 18, 2007 at 09:10
that's is sooooo mean
annonymoss on May 13, 2007 at 07:10
hehe - awesome - god i love the internet - can say whatever :P -
seriously kinda stuff u love reading aloud - and john how are u going
to sue?? its just humour :P laugh a little - it helps
Gothbren on May 23, 2007 at 02:59
hey!this is how ya really sound so, quit hating on jokes.this is
funny!!
mary on June 07, 2007 at 11:37
This is stupid we name are words by throwing pans in the air.
BRUCE LEE on June 07, 2007 at 11:39
me no undostian tis booship ping ling lang chang hong kong fui
jackie chan on June 07, 2007 at 11:41
i guess it was funny but it kinda sounded like u r mocking the chinese
KyM3s on June 27, 2007 at 10:22
hey, guys, this is not Chinese. totally different! OK, just tell u
some Chinese: how r u? 你好－chinese word i love u
我爱你
oldfox on July 19, 2007 at 03:12
John - If your were Chinese, I think you'd know how to spell it..
duh..
Hope on July 27, 2007 at 11:05
im chinese,i kinda find it funny and a bit offensive
me chinese mang on August 01, 2007 at 11:39
i think it's boring all u bassicly do is make it up
Michaela on August 29, 2007 at 08:36
well if u ask me i think chinese is very very very very borring and u
only make it up. Fron japan
Natasha on August 29, 2007 at 08:38
are you guys kidding ? this shit is hilarious !!! people make fnu
of my langude all the time ( its danish ) but hey.. its not like its
in a mean way.. smile.. its fun
malia on September 09, 2007 at 11:59
im going to sue u pplz
omg on September 20, 2007 at 11:31
that is too too too funny.
stella on November 06, 2007 at 05:27
This is Chinglish... and soooo funny. :)
kung fu on November 14, 2007 at 06:11
you idiots i got the joke but its not funny at all i just looked at
it with a blank stare and didnt even laugh once im not even chinese
but i live in china and i know chinese did you go to the beach?
--- ni qu le hai bian ma?
joe on November 22, 2007 at 02:13
Here, here. I'm Chinese, and while I found it offensive, it wasn't a
problem. All I had to do was remember how people pronounce Mandarin.
You know how people suck at that? One guy tried to say "You're
stupid," but the guy he learned it from tricked him and taught him to
say "I'm stupid." Even then, what he said sounded like he was talking
about pandas...in English.
One who can type on January 07, 2008 at 12:44
Hope - If you're not Chinese, then you should type better. You mean
"you," right?
Ahem on January 07, 2008 at 12:48
yu no are funny. tink yu no how to speak lik me peep hole. we no talk
lik tat. ok me go play wit my poni now. bye bye.
sofa king on January 24, 2008 at 11:22
i lub this stuff
mi iz not chainis on February 14, 2008 at 02:53
u chinese people dun no how ta laff? gosh laff at urself once in
whillee!! u people take evrything offensively-if someone calls u
chinese, its "racist!!--say asianss" umm well there are many more
countries in asia- so technically-ASIA DOESNT BELONG TO THE
CHINESSEEEEE!!
omggoshiess on February 26, 2008 at 05:34
this is shit i study chines i never saw somthing like this i should
teach u chines
abdi on March 25, 2008 at 12:21
Armless man in chinese: No Tai Shu
MAYRA on May 02, 2008 at 05:57
Oh Jeah, that old Joke again, it was already old when i was born and
it frequently came up in many different flavor offending almost all
asian and eufopea Languages. I think it is immortal, even if many
People moan at it, it will continue to come up frequently
smellcaster on May 08, 2008 at 09:17
HAAH this is hilarious!!! love it :D :D make more !!!
pompkin on May 25, 2008 at 09:55
i think that people who talk chinese don't get it he don't try to
teach u chinese it's just a joke. so please don't post to just tell us
that.
barrakouda on May 30, 2008 at 01:34
me chinese, me so solly. me get taken away from famiry to become
orympic gymnast. ME ROVE U RONG TIME!
doodlepoopy on August 12, 2008 at 11:32
hey dumbass its european not eufopea
captain obvious on January 11, 2009 at 09:54
some thing wrong? sum ting wong
SOME on May 21, 2009 at 06:15
john you spelled chinese wrong so you are not chinese. you hobo and
these jokes are funny
Bob the ho bo on June 23, 2009 at 11:41
i like chicken and chicken wings and chicken pie and chicken smoothies
fat pig on June 23, 2009 at 11:44
i like poo parties and peanuts i lik 2 speak
gibberish.grtsheyjhytwh65w that means u smell lik poo
im chinese i like coke on June 23, 2009 at 11:47
iT SOUNDS LIKE BROKEN UP SILABALS SPELLED VERY WRONGLY
MORGAN on August 30, 2009 at 09:46

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