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If it's stupid, but it works, it's not stupid. -- Amphibious Warfare Review, June 1992
If it's suicide you're after Master Bruce, I have the recipe for an old family potion.
It's slow working and quite painful, you'd like it....
If it's the thought that counts, why aren't there more pregnant women around?
If it's too fast, you're too old -- seen on a bumper sticke
If it's too loud, you're too old. -- Bumper sticke
If it's too loud, you're too old." -- The Heavy Metal motto
If it's tourist season, where do I get a license?
If it's Tourist Season, why can't we shoot 'em ???
If it's Tuesday, this must be someone else's fortune.
If it's useless and does nothing, call it v1.0
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