- Pie are not square. Pie are round. Cornbread are square.
- The integral of e to the x is equal to f of the quantity
u to the n.
/ x n | e = f(u ) /...
- A physics joke: "Energy equals milk chocolate square" Naoto Kimura, Cal State-Northridge
- Russell to Whitehead: "My Godel is killing me!" Dennis Healy, Dartmouth
- A doctor, a lawyer and a mathematician were discussing the relative merits
of having a wife or a mistress.
The lawyer says: "For sure a mistress is better. If you have a wife and want a divorce...
- Statisticians probably do it
Algebraists do it in groups.
Al Sethuraman, Calma Company, San Diego...
- Von Neumann and Nobert Weiner were both the subject of many dotty professor stories.
- C programmers do it with long pointers.
(Logicians do it) or [not (logicians do it)].
- Theorem: a cat has nine tails.
No cat has eight tails.
A cat has one tail more than no cat. Therefore, a cat has nine tails. Arndt Jonasso...
- The USDA once wanted to make cows produce milk faster, to improve the dairy industry.