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You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System.
Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use....
You have reached the Des Moines chapter of the Iowa Procrastination Society.
Please leave a message after the tone and we'll get around to it....
You have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep.
-- Answering machine madness - brevity...
You have reached the offices of the planet Zarton. All our agents are busy undermining the governments of the Earth and cannot come to phone at the moment.
However, your name and number can be le...
You have reached the Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility.
We are unable to come to the phone right now....
You have reached the Suicide Prevention Hotline. All our lines are busy now, but if you leave your name and number, someone will get back to you as soon as possible.
-- Answering machine madne...
You have succeeded in life when all you really want is only what you really need. -- Vernon Howard
You have taken the chalice and hurled it viciously to the ground.
You have taken the vase and hurled it delicately to the ground.
You have taken yourself too seriously. Knock it off.
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