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If you can't stay healthy, find a sickness you like.
If you can't take a joke, you shouldn't be one.
If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you had better go back home and crawl under your bed.
-- Q to Picard, "Q-Who?", stardate 42761.3...
If you can't tell a fib, make it a BIG lie.
If you can't tell the difference, there is no difference.
If you can't tie good knots... tie many.
If you can't trust a woman with a choice, how can you trust her with a baby?
If you can't understand it, it is intuitively obvious.
If you can't understand it, name it. -- Taber's Law of Scientific Research
If you can't win, at least make the person ahead of you break the record.
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