Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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I went to the doctor last week. He told me to take all my clothes off.
Then he said, "You'll have to diet." I said, "What color?" -- Ken Dodd...
I went to the eye doctor and found out I needed glasses for reading.
So, I got some flip-up contact lenses. -- Steven Wrigh...
I went to the fights last night and a hockey game broke out.
I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint.
It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included....
I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.
-- Steven Wrigh...
I went to the Net and all I got was this stupid tagline.
I went to the ophthalmologist today about an eye condition.
To paraphrase his diagnosis, I had enough blood and sweat, but not enough tears....
I went to the race track once and bet on a horse that was so good that it took seven others to beat him!

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