Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

Home › Fortune Cookies › Miscellaneous Collections

I got a chain letter by fax. It's very simple. You just fax a dollar bill to everybody on the list.
-- Steven Wrigh...
I got a friend who is not very kind to pets. He has a pet--he rubs its face in it, hits it with a belt--and that could kill a parakeet!
-- Andy Andrew...
I got a funny feeling they've got plastic in the after-life. -- Beck
I got a garage door opener. It can't close. Just open. -- Steven Wrigh
I got a job as a short-order cook.
I got a job--looking for one. I been out of work so long I forgot what kind of work I'm out of.
-- Robin Harri...
I got a Mac-10 for officer Wind, Damn his devil ass Need to be shipped back to Kansas, In a casket, crew-cut faggot, Now he ain't nothin' but Food for the maggots.
.... -- Ice Cube, We Had to Tea...
I got a mind like a steel trap. It's rusty & illegal in 19 states.
I got a Motie in my eye.
I got an aunt named Minnie. Weighs 264. When she sits on the chair there's so much of her there--most of her sits on the floor.
-- Morey Amsterdam...

< previous

3339