- My buyer told me that he lived in the same house for 10 years.
When I checked, I found out he'd still be there today if the Governor hadn't pardoned him....
- Why do you have your front door leading right into the dining room?
So my relatives won't have to waste any time....
- The sellers told me their house was near the water. It was in the basement.
- How much are they asking for your rent now? Oh, about twice a day.
- I have a temporary mortgage. What do you mean temporary? Until they foreclose.
- Realtor sign--We have "lots" to be thankful for.
- Realtor: first you folks tell me what you can afford, then we'll have a good laugh and go on from there.
- The dream of the older generation was to pay off a mortgage.
The dream of today's young families is to get one....
- There is no longer a need for the neutron bomb. We already have something that destroys people and leaves buildings intact.
It's called a mortgage....
- If you think no one cares you're alive, miss a couple of house payments.