Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence .
.. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child -- if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
-- W. C. Field...
Magnet, n.: Something acted upon by magnetism Magnetism, n.
Something acting upon a magnet....
Magnocartic, adj.: Any automobile that, when left unattended, attracts shopping carts.
-- Sniglets, "Rich Hall & Friend...
Magpie, n.: A bird whose theivish disposition suggested to someone that it might be taught to talk.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
Maier's Law: If the facts don't conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.
Corollaries: (1) The bigger the theory, the better....
Main's Law: For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
Maintainer's Motto: If we can't fix it, it ain't broke.
Major Premise: Sixty men can do a piece of work sixty times as quickly as one man.
Minor Premise: One man can dig a posthole in sixty seconds....
Majority, n.: That quality that distinguishes a crime from a law.

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