Related:

• I'm a Bum...a BEACH Bum!
• Get out of Bumtown, you bum! -- A bum, "The Day the Violence Died
• Did you hear that anal sex is a bum trip.
• VENTRILOQUIST Someone whose antics you get sick of after just a few minutes, and want to throw a bucket of water over just to see their dummy make blubbering noises.
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA...
• RETURN An experience of sheer terror. Here's some advice for when you want to return goods to their place of purchase.
  - If you're going to even think about mentioning refunds, take along proof of identity, a shotgun, several lawyers, and all of the above....
• AND NOW A WORD FROM THE PENTAGON To all those sissy wimps who don't want a war - remember what we're talking about here!
  What about all the oil we won't be able to pollute the atmosphere with if we don't liberate Kuwait?...
• SEMESTER A university half-year, especially designed so that the first ten or so weeks are piss-easy, followed by about four weeks of assignment/revision/exam absolute misery.
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA...
• KOALA Small furry Australian marsupial. Don't believe what you see on the telly, these are vicious little bastards.
  They'll quite happily claw you to death then piss all over you if you don't give them a Eucalyptus leaf to eat....