10. Goodbye boring brown trucks, hello bit****' red Ferraris
9. Permission to smack anyone who calls it "ups"
8. Forget that "lift with your legs, not with your back" crap --
we're lifting with our backs, da** it!
7. All the styrofoam peanuts we can eat
6. Permission to tell Fed Ex guys they can absolutely positively go
5. $10 bonus for every hernia
4. Female drivers can refuse to deliver to White House when
Hillary's away *
3. One ten-minute break a day for booty calls
2. New shorts that don't make a guy's a** look so huge
1. Put a da** door on the side of the truck
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