Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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Rule of Creative Research: (1) Never draw what you can copy.
(2) Never copy what you can trace. (3) Never trace what you can cut out and paste down....
Rule of Defactualization: Information deteriorates upward through bureaucracies.
Rule of Feline Frustration: When your cat has fallen asleep on your lap and looks utterly content and adorable, you will suddenly have to go to the bathroom.
Rule of the Great: When people you greatly admire appear to be thinking deep thoughts, they probably are thinking about lunch.
Rules for Academic Deans: (1) HIDE!!!! (2) If they find you, LIE!
!!! -- Father Damian C. Fandal...
Rules for driving in New York: (1) Anything done while honking your horn is legal.
(2) You may park anywhere if you turn your four-way flashers on....
RULES OF EATING -- THE BRONX DIETER'S CREED (1) Never eat on an empty stomach.
(2) Never leave the table hungry. (3) When traveling, never leave a country hungry....
Rules: (1) The boss is always right. (2) When the boss is wrong, refer to rule 1.
Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence Tip #1
How to tell when you are dead. (1) Little things start bothering you...
Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence (1) Never use an elevator in a building that has been hit by a nuclear bomb
use the stairs. (2) When you're flying through the air, remember to roll...

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