Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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Q: How many IBM CPU's does it take to execute a job?
A: Four; three to hold it down, and one to rip its head off....
Q: How many IBM types does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 100....
Q: How many journalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Three....
Q: How many Martians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One and a half.
Q: How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to the earlier joke....
Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to screw in the lightbulb and two to fend off all those Californians trying to share the experience....
Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools....
Q: How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. The Universe spins the bulb, and the Zen master stays out of the way....
Q: What's a light-year? A: One-third less calories than a regular year.
Q: Why did the tachyon cross the road? A: Because it was on the other side.

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