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If it's Tuesday, this must be someone else's fortune.
If Jesus Christ were to come today, people would not even crucify him.
They would ask him to dinner, and hear what he had to say, and make fun of it. -- Thomas Carlyle...
If just one piece of mail gets lost, well, they'll just think they forgot to send it.
If life is a stage, I want some better lighting.
If little else, the brain is an educational toy. -- Tom Robbi
If little green men land in your back yard, hide any little green women you've got in the house.
-- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac...
If mathematically you end up with the wrong answer, try multiplying by the page number.
If money can't buy happiness, I guess you'll just have to rent it.
If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing
If one studies too zealously, one easily loses his pants. -- A. Einstein.
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