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Here, make yourself at home. --Naw, that's OK.
I don't want to stick to anything. -- Caddyshack...
Here on earth I'll have my cake Gonna eat it too, make no mistake 'Cause if it's a question of to be or not to be I'll put on my boots and go see what I can see.
-- Crash Test Dummie...
Here pigs will fly, lightning will strike twice, hell will freeeze over, and eventually, things will get really interesting.
.....
Here rests his head upon the lap of earth, A youth to fortune and to fame unknow
Fair Science frown'd not on his humble birth, And Melancholy mark'd him for her own....
Here's a floppy with a tar of a compressed cpio archive.
.. and they say Unix is hard to use... -- Karl...
Here's a good gag if you go swimming in a swamp and when you com out you're all covered with leeches.
Just say, "Hey, has anybody seen my raisins?" (Because leeches kind of look like big raisins.)...
Here's a good joke to do during an earthquake: straddle a big crack in the ground, and if it opens wider, go "Whoa!
Whoa!" and flail your arms around, like you're going to fall in. -- Deep Though...
Here's a good thing to do if you go to a party and you don't know anybody
First, take out the garbage....
Here's a good tip for when you go to the beach: A sand dollar may look like a nice cracker that someone left, but trust me, they don't taste like it.
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
Here's a good trick: Get a job as a judge at the Olympics.
Then, if some guy sets a world record, pretend that you didn't see it and go, "Okay, is everybody ready to start now?...
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