Miscellaneous Collections

Miscellaneous Collections

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SWEATER: A garment worn by a child when their mother feels chilly.
Sweet April showers do spring May flowers. -- Thomas Tusse
Sweet sixteen is beautiful Bess, And her voice is changing -- from "No" to "Yes".
Swerve me? The path to my fixed purpose is laid with iron rails, whereon my soul is grooved to run.
Swipple's Rule of Order: He who shouts the loudest has the floor.
Symptom: Drinking fails to give taste and satisfaction, beer is unusually pale and clear.
Problem: Glass empty. Action Required: Find someone who will buy you another beer....
Symptom: Everything has gone dark. Fault: The Bar is closing.
Action Required: Panic. Symptom: You awaken to find your bed hard, cold and wet....
Symptom: Feet cold and wet, glass empty. Fault: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
Action Required: Turn glass other way up so that open end points toward ceiling....
Symptom: Floor blurred. Fault: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
Action Required: Find someone who will buy you another beer....
Symptom: Floor swaying. Fault: Excessive air turbulence, perhaps due to air-hockey game in progress.
Action Required: Insert broom handle down back of jacket. Symptom: Everything has gone dim...

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