Related:

• If you anticipate bus delays by leaving your house thirty minutes early, your bus will arrive as soon as you reach the bus stop or when you light up a cigarette, whichever comes first.
  -- John Corcora...
• Bus schedules are arranged so your bus will arrive at the transfer point precisely one minute after the connecting bus has left.
  -- John Corcora...
• The last rush-hour express bus to your neighborhood leaves five minutes before you get off work.
  -- John Corcora...
• Any bus that can be the wrong bus will be the wrong bus.
  All others are out of service or full. -- John Corcora...
• The amount of time you have to wait for a bus is directly proportional to the inclemency of the weather.
  -- John Corcora...
• If you hail a taxi, your bus trundles into view just as you get in.
• SHB: Stop and Hang Bu
• You need to upgrade your VESA local bus to a MasterCard local bus.
• Bus stop rat bag: hah, hah! Charade you are... -- Pink Floyd