Related:

• You once spent an afternoon on the Samaritan switchboard and 4 people committed suicide!
  -- Lister, trying to persuade Rimmer that he knows him....
• Lister: Look at what he's given me for dinner: a pea on toast.
  One pea. I tell you, I'm that far from cracking....
• You didn't have the right parents, whose parents did you have?
  -- Lister to Rimmer in Red Dwarf 'The End'...
• Holly: We are talking Jape of the Decade. We are talking April, May, June, July, and August, fool.
  Yes, that's right -- I am Queeg. Rimmer, Lister, Cat: WHAT?!!!!!! -- Red Dwarf - 'Queeg'...
• Rimmer: But that was a barroom brawl, that was a common pub fight, a shambolic drunken set-to.
  Lister: ...which you started. Rimmer: I just made an innocuous comment....
• Lister: We used to be your shipmates. Rimmer: Only .
  .. we've forgotten you. Lister: Yeah. Rimmer: [to Cat] Well, I don't know about you, but I'm convinced....
• Rimmer, they're a bunch of arrogant, pompous, emotionally weird, stuck up megalomaniacs.
  ..do you really think you'll fit in with them? What am I saying?...
• Lister: Come on, what are you, a man or a munchkin?
  Rimmer: I'm off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz. -- Red Dwarf 'Parallel Universe'...
• Cat: Look at my hands, I had lovely hands. Liste
  Well wear the smegging gloves. Cat: (picking up gloves) Marigold with blue?...