Related:

• How many pessimists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. Why bother? It's just going to burn out anyway....
• How many boarding school students -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, they have their parents do it for them....
• How many pre-med students -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None, pre-meds don't screw, they study....
• How many Professors -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None...what do you think their graduate students are for?...
• How many accountants -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None-just assume it's changed....
• How many Microsoft engineers -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. They just define darkness as an industry standard....
• How many rocket scientist -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None they just tell Marcus to do it....
• How many keyboardists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None: "I've got a candle that looks just like it....
• How many Capricorns -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None: Why should I bother? It's probably just going to burn out again tomorrow anyway....