Related:

• Bart: Dad, isn't this stealing? Homer: Read your town charter, boy.
  If foodstuff should touch the ground, said foodstuff shall be turned over to the village idiot....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Lurleen, I can't get your song outta my mind. I haven't felt this way since `Funky Town.
  ' -- Homer Simpson Colonel Home...
• Maybe I should just cut my losses, give up on Lisa, and make a fresh start with Maggie.
  -- Homer Simpson Lisa's Pony...
• Homer: Listen here: my name is Homer J. Simpson. You guys think I'm dead, but I'm not.
  Now I want you to straighten this out without a lot of your bureaucratic red tape and mumbo- jumbo!...
• Announcer: Today on "Ben": mothers and runaway daughters reunited by their hatred of Homer Simpson.
  And here's your host, Gentle Ben. [a bear wearing a helmet with a microphone runs out] Woman 1...
• Homer: {[ringing doorbell] Sugar man! [eats some from the bag]} Skinne
  {Door-to-door sugar? [chuckles] What a marvelous idea....
• Abe: Let me through! Let me through. Lisa: Oh, Grampa, they pelted you too?
  Abe: No, actually, I fell down at the Big Boy. -- Great free-food scams, "Homer the Vigilante...
• Doctor: Krusty, your plastic surgery is complete. Now, when I remove the bandages, don't be alarmed by the total stranger staring back at you.
  [hands him a mirror] Krusty: Aah! I look exactly the same, you moron!...