Homer: Listen here: my name is Homer J. Simpson. You guys think
I'm dead, but I'm not. Now I want you to straighten this
out without a lot of your bureaucratic red tape and mumbo-
jumbo!
Bureaucrat: [typing] OK, Mr. Simpson, I'll just make the change here...
and you're all set.
Homer: I don't like your attitude, you water-cooler dictator. What
do you have in that secret government file anyway? I have a
right to read it.
Bureaucrat: [spinning monitor around] You sure do.
Homer: [reading] "Wife: Marjorie. Children: Bartholomew, Lisa" --
aha! See? This thing is all screwed up! Who the heck is
Margaret Simpson?
Bureaucrat: Uh, your youngest daughter.
Homer: [mocking] "Uh, your youngest daughter". Well how about
this? This thing says my mother's still alive; she died
when I was a kid!
[goes to window] See that stone angel up there? That's my
mother's grave. My dad points it out every time we drive
by.
Bureaucrat: Mr. Simpson, uh...maybe you should actually go up there.
-- A new idea, "Mother Simpson"
I'm dead, but I'm not. Now I want you to straighten this
out without a lot of your bureaucratic red tape and mumbo-
jumbo!
Bureaucrat: [typing] OK, Mr. Simpson, I'll just make the change here...
and you're all set.
Homer: I don't like your attitude, you water-cooler dictator. What
do you have in that secret government file anyway? I have a
right to read it.
Bureaucrat: [spinning monitor around] You sure do.
Homer: [reading] "Wife: Marjorie. Children: Bartholomew, Lisa" --
aha! See? This thing is all screwed up! Who the heck is
Margaret Simpson?
Bureaucrat: Uh, your youngest daughter.
Homer: [mocking] "Uh, your youngest daughter". Well how about
this? This thing says my mother's still alive; she died
when I was a kid!
[goes to window] See that stone angel up there? That's my
mother's grave. My dad points it out every time we drive
by.
Bureaucrat: Mr. Simpson, uh...maybe you should actually go up there.
-- A new idea, "Mother Simpson"
Related:
- Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I
call it.
Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?... - Marge: A tombstone?!
Patty: It came with the burial plot, but that's not importa
he important thing is, Homer's dead. Selma... - Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish.
Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?... - Homer: Ooh la la!
Lisa: Hi, Dad.
Homer: You look great, sweetheart.
Lisa: [abashed] Thanks. Homer: Little Lisa, Lisa Simpson.... - Homer: [snores]
Bart: Look alive, Simpson, I'm not paying you to goldbrick.
Homer: [wakes up] Uh... Yes sir. Bart: Now get cracking on my long division, and don't forget to show your work, Simpson.... - Marge: Homer! Bart! Maggie! Company eating rules.
Homer: [burps] Oh, right. [everyone eats all delicate, like] Ba... - Bart: Mr. Burns, I don't want to seem ungrateful, but I want to
go home to my family.
Burns: [sighs] I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell you this, but.... - Homer: [yelling to be heard] You really did it this time, Bart!
You're in for the punishment of a lifetime!... - Jasper: Why bother voting? He's guilty.
Flanders: Well, we might as well make it official.
Homer: What does "sequestered" mean? Skinner: If the jury is deadlocked they're put up in a hotel together so they can't communicate with the outside world....
