European countries are worried about acid rain, too. Has anyone yet tried high pH umbrellas?
Immigration officials already are tightening security in Los Angeles for the Summer Olympics.
Too late, however, to keep out most Californians....
The prime rate is now at its highest level since October, 1982.
And is further proof that the government isn't losing interest in the economy....
These disputes between baseball managers and umpires slow down our reading of the paper too much.
We have to pause to translate all the (bleeps)....
Reading "bleep" quotes in the paper from baseball umpires makes us see more clearly why they're called the men in blue.
Inspired by a current movie, we're thinking of starting a company that will rid your house of folks who stay too long after dinner.
The company's name? What else? Guestbusters....
Our second idea for a new company would rid your back yard of especially nasty kids.
Its name? Grossbusters. Imagine how Gerry Ferraro's mother feels....
We suppose now we should be ready for endless joke reruns that will go something like
Who was that lady I saw you with?" "That was no lady, that was my vice president....
How can Geraldine Ferraro help balance the ticket? Why, we bet Fritz Mondale outweighs her by 80 pounds.
To people who say women shouldn't work outside the home, Ms.
Ferraro can say, "I won't be. I'll be vice president, remember?...