The Simpsons

Home › Fortune Cookies › The Simpsons

I hate to interrupt your judging me, but I wanted you to know that I've made a couple of really important decisions.
Number 1: I'm cutting the cable as soon as the fight's over, and Number 2: I'm no...
Lisa: Dad, we may have saved your soul. Announce
[from the TV inside] Tatum is reeling from the champ's exquisite hailing....
Apu: What a donnybrook, eh, Mr. Burns? Burns: Oh, hogwash!
Why, I once watched Gentleman Jim Corbett fight an Eskimo fellow bare-knuckled for a hundred and thirteen rounds!...
Dad, I beg you to reconsider. Tractor pulls. Atlanta Braves baseball.
Joe Franklin! -- Bart begs Homer not to cut the cable hook-up, "Homer vs....
Marge: Mmm, Lisa, you don't look well. Lisa: I'll make it Mom.
Just tape my lunchbox to my hand. -- Lisa wakes up ill, "Bart's Dog Gets an F...
Homer: Maaarge, the dog is hungry. Marge: Well, then, feed him.
Homer: Yeees, Master. -- Do I have to do everything around here? "Bart's Dog Gets an F...
Bart: No way, she's faking! If Lisa[?] stays home, &l
I> stay home. Lisa: If Bart stays home, I'm going to school....
Lisa, you wasted chicken pox. Don't waste the mumps!
-- Bart telling Lisa how to enjoy being ill, "Bart's Dog Gets an F...
You! Wandering mongrel! Get out of my Mom and Pop operation.
-- Apu shooing Santa's Little Helper away, "Bart's Dog Gets an F...
You know, they've got the velcro straps, a water pump in the tongue, built-in odometer, reflective sidewalls, and little vanity licence plates!
-- Ned Flanders showing off his `Assassins' sneakers, ...

< previous

435

436
437
438
439
440
441
442
443
444
654
next >