Related:

• Apu: [introducing himself] Apu Nahasapeemapetilon. Nigel
  Hmm. Never fit on a marquee, luv. From now on, your name is Apu de Beaumarchais....
• Skinner: Only one question remains, gentlemen...what do we call ourselves?
  Nigel: How about, "Handsome Homer Simpson Plus Three?...
• Homer, Skinner, and Apu sing] For all the latest medical poop Call Surgeon General C.
  Everett Koop. Poo poo pa-doop. Apu: This is worse than your song about Mr....
• Reporter: I have a question for Apu de Beaumarchais.
  Isn't it true that you're really an Indian?...
• Apu: Sir, it may surprise you to know that _I_ am an immigrant.
  Homer: You? Pfft, get out. -- Well, duh, "Much Apu About Nothing...
• Man 1: I need one 29-cent stamp. Apu: That's $1.
  85. Man 2: I'll have $2.00 worth of gas, please. Apu...
• Homer: Every afternoon at Moe's, Chief Wiggum, Principal Skinner, Apu, and I would get together and sing, and the crowds went wild!
  [Scene shows roses and underwear getting thrown on stage] Barney...
• Woods: Apu! Apu: Oh, the searing kiss of hot lead.
  How I've missed you! I mean -- I think I'm dying. -- "Homer and Apu...
• Homer: Well, _that_ was a big bust. Is he _really_ the head of the Kwik-E-Mart?
  Apu: [growls, reaches towards Homer] Homer: No need to apologize, Apu...