Related:

• Homer: About last night. You might have noticed Daddy acting a little strange and you probably don't understand why.
  Bart: I understand why. You were wasted. -- Damage control, "War of the Simpso...
• Rev.: Marge is going to tell us about your faults, why don't you tell us about hers?
  Homer: Oh, she's perfect. Rev.: Come on, Homer, what are her faults?...
• I am going to explain to you why we went to war. Why mankind always goes to war.
  It is not social or political. It is not countries that go to war, but men....
• Bart: But I saw the murder and then I saw you bury the corpse in the back yard!
  Ned: [weeping] All right, it's true. I am a murderer!...
• Bart: Please, Dad? If you let Otto stay, he'll help around the house and chip in a few bucks whenever he can.
  Homer: All right, he can stay. But I get to treat him like garbage....
• Marge: Homey, are you really going to ignore Grampa for the rest of your life.
  Homer: Of course not, Marge, just for the rest of his life....
• Marge: Oh Homer... What are we going to do? Homer: Now, don't worry.
  Our situation isn't as bad as it seems. And you're forgetting---I'm an experienced woodsman!...
• Bart: [in the present] Wow, Dad, you really threw a tantrum like a little sissy girl?
  Homer: Oh, just that one time. Marge: Actually, when I was about to have Bart -- Home...
• Marge: [slaps Homer's hand] Homer! You promised. Home
  I promised I wouldn't eat? Never! You lie!...