Related:

• If I could kick my own butt, I would amaze myself!
• Sometimes I go on and on until I annoy even myself. -- SLR
• Jev: "Father, you know you're not supposed to probe someone's memory unless they've given you permission.
  Tarmin: "You are right. But sometimes, with a beautiful woman, I cannot help myself....
• Picard: "Mister Data, your resourcefulness never ceases to amaze me.
  Data: "Thank you, sir." -- "Unification I", Stardate 45240.1...
• Sometimes when I look at my children I say to myself, 'Lillian, you should have stayed a virgin.
  ' -- Lillian Carte...
• I came out of twelve years of college and I didn't even know how to sew.
  All I could do was account -- I couldn't even account for myself. -- Firesign Theatre...
• I don't need you, you know--I can be lonely all by myself.
• Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're talking to.
  Then, on the way out, slam the door. -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
• You know, sometimes even <I'd> rather be watching football.
  .. -- God chats with Homer about missing church on Sunday, "Homer the Heretic...